Mario's Past Adventures Come Back

By andrei

Prologue: The Mushroom Kingdom

One day in the Mushroom Kingdom, Mario is going to visit Princess Peach when he sees Toadsworth waiting for them.

Toadsworth: Master Mario, Princess Peach wants to see you again in Rogueport.

Mario: Why does-a she want to see us-a there?

Toadsworth: Well uh... She uh... She has something to show you that she found there. She said that she will never tell me what it is until you see it too.

Mario: And-a how do you-a know all of these things?

Toadsworth: She told me the message with a, uh... radio.

Luigi: Hey Bro. What's up?

Mario: Oh nothing, just-a going to Rogueport to see what-a the princess has-a to show me.

Luigi: Cool! Can I come?

Mario: Sure. Let's-a go!

Chapter 1: Welcome Back

[i]World 1

Toadsworth: Well Master Mario and Master Lin… Linguini, here we are.

Mario: Wait a second, wait a second! How come you got here faster than us-a?!

Luigi: Yeah, and how come you're calling me Linguini?!

Toadsworth: Well uhh... You see, well... Oh, why am I waiting here to be stuck with you morons? Now, time to take my disguise off and battle you too morons.

White smoke appears on Toadsworth and then the Mario Bros. see that Toadsworth is actually Doopliss.

Doopliss: Yuk, yuk, yuk, yuk, yuk. Try to beat me now with my new ability.

Mario and Linguini (I mean Luigi): HEY! We're not morons!

Luigi: Well at least I'm not...

Mario: What's that supposed to-a mean?!

Luigi: Never mind, let's beat this freak.

Doopliss: HEY! I'm not a freak!

Luigi: Yeah, you're a freak-in-a sheet. HAHAHA!

Doopliss: That's it, prepare to DIE!

Battle Begin

Mario: Come on, Luigi, let's-a battle this freak for calling us morons.

Well technically you are already in the battle arena.

Mario: So? Your point-a is?

The point is that what you said is messed up and makes just a little sense. And you're a moron.

Mario: Luigi, did you-a call me a moron?

Luigi: Um... No?

Mario: Yes you-a did, and if-a I'm a moron then you're a bigger-a one.

Luigi: Mario, can we please just fight?

Mario: Ok-a, I'll take the-a first shot. Power Smash!

Doopliss: Ow.

That does 8 damage. Doopliss' HP is at 32.

Luigi: Ok, my turn. Ground Pound!

Doopliss: OOWW!

That does 7 damage. Doopliss' HP is at 25.

Doopliss: My turn. Transform!

Doopliss transforms into Mario.

Mario: That-a is really-a getting old. My FP is out, I-a guess I have-a to use Jump.

Doopliss: Will you two ever stop?

That does 4 damage. Doopliss' HP is at  21.

Luigi: My turn. Power Jump!

Doopliss: OW, OW, OW, OW, OW, OW!!

That does 6 damage. Doopliss' HP is at 15.

Doopliss: I... will... still... be able... t-to... beat YOU! Power Smash!

Mario: Luigi... I'm-a...feeling-a bad...

That did 8 damage. Mario's HP is at 2.

Luigi: Hang on, Mario, we're not finished with this freak yet.


Mario: Ohh... Feeling... bad-a.

A member of the audience throws Mario a Mushroom.

Mario: Thanks. I'm-a going-a to eat it-a right now.

Luigi: Ok, so you used an item so it's my turn I guess. Hammer!

That does 4 damage. Doopliss' HP is at 11.

Doopliss: My... turn... Power Jump!

Luigi: OW, OW, OW, OW. Hey, why did you stop?

Doopliss: Yeah, I stink at jumping, that's why.

That did 4 damage. Luigi's HP is at 6.

Luigi: Gotta hold... on...

Member of the audience: Hey Linguini, take this!

He throws a hammer at Luigi and causes 2 damage. Luigi HP is at 4.


Mario: Welcome-a to my-a world, Luigi. Jump!

Doopliss: OW, OW!

That did 4 damage. Doopliss' HP is at 7.

Luigi: Dizzy... uh... Hammer!

Doopliss: OW! Classic old Mario Bros…

That did 4 damage. Doopliss' HP is at 3.

Doopliss: It's... over... WAIT! Super Hammer!

Mario and Luigi: OOOOOOWWWWWWW!

That did 4 damage to both Mario Bros. Luigi is out and Mario's HP is at 2.

Luigi: MARIOOOOOOOOOOoooooooo...

Mario: OH NO-a, LUIGI! You will pay Doopliss-a! Hammer!

Doopliss: AAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh...

Mario: Yeah, I win!

That did 8 damage since Mario used all his strength. Doopliss is out.

Mario: Here Luigi, take-a this-a Mushroom. And now-a, Doopliss, is the princess-a really here?

Doopliss: No, I just wanted to get revenge on you, not on Linguini here.


Mario: Why-a you big liar!

The ground starts to shake.

Everyone: What was that?

Goombella comes in.

Goombella: Mario, Luigi, Doopliss? Doopliss, what are you doing here?


Goombella: EEEEKKK! Never mind, the reason that this place is shaking is because the Crystal Stars have been lost in other worlds and they became our guardians since you left. The only way to get them back is to find them like last time, but this time each Crystal Star has gone into a different world. I found this Crystal Star above the casino and-

Sorry, your sentences are too long.

Mario: Okm but-a how do we-a get out of here?

Luigi: Hey everyone, I found a portal. It says "To Isle..." To what Isle?

Goombella: That was sooo random.


Doopliss: I don't care what island it is. I don't want to die, so let's just go through!

Mario: Ok. Let's-a go!

Luigi: ...

Doopliss: ...

Gombella: ...

Luigi: Are you ever scared?

Mario: No. Now let's-a go!

In the portal...

Everyone: AAAAAHHHHH!!!

Where will they arrive? Why did Doopliss join them? What will happen to Rogueport? Why am I asking you? Most of these questions will be answered next chapter.

Chapter 2: Have Fun on the Island

World 2

Everyone: AAHHH!

The portal finally brings them to the island

Mario: Wait I-a know this place, this-a is Isle Delfino.

Luigi: Hey Goombella, what is the point of this adventure?

Goombella: I would've told you but the narrator wouldn't let me finish the sentence.

Opps, sorry about that.

Goombella: That's okay, but Rogueport needs the Crystal Stars before an earthquake starts and destroys the whole place. But since that already happened we have to find the Crystal Stars so everything will be back to normal.

Mario: Why did they-a leave in-a the first place?

Goombella: You know, I'm not quite sure why, all I know is that Rogueport and every place on the Magical Map will be destroyed unless you find the seven Crystal Stars.

Luigi: Ok, but I have one more question for Doopliss. Why did you come with us?

Doopliss: Uh... I didn't want to die in the earthquake.

Luigi: Makes sense, nobody would want to die in the earthquake.

Mario: Wait, didn't-a you say you-a found one on top of the-a casino?

Goombella: Yes I did, but I'm sure each Crystal Star is harder to find than the last.

FLUDD: Mario, is that you?

Mario: FLUDD! I-a never thought I'd-a see you again. It’s been a long-a time.

FLUDD: Welcome to you and your friends, Mario. I suppose you're looking for a Crystal Star.

Mario: Yes I-a am. How did-a you know?

FLUDD: I scanned everyone here when I started talking to you, and saw what all of you were looking for. Now enough talking, we must find it so we can go to another world.

Mario: Ok. Let's-a go.

They soon arrive at a contest in the center of Isle Delfino.

Pianta: Welcome, everybody, to the Delfino Contest! If you want the Grand Prize then you must go through the challenges that I have prepared. Winner gets this rock shaped like a star and that sparkles.

Luigi: That looks like the Crystal Star. But how do we get it?

Doopliss: I know, let's steal it while he's not looking.

Mario: Have you-a ever seen me do chapter-a four?

Doopliss: No.

Mario: I-a see.

Luigi: I say we win the contest.

Goombella: I agree.

Doopliss: I don't.

Mario: Well too-a bad, because we're-a winning-a the contest.

FLUDD: Let's listen for what we have to do.

Pianta: Ok, now for the rules. First, you must run and somehow get to the passageway of Corona Mountain, and finish the course. Then you must get out of the top of Corona Mountain and come back here first to get this rock.

Il Piantissimo: That rock is as good as mine.

Shadow Mario: ... (I could use that rock for my room.)


FLUDD: Tough luck, Mario, especially with Il Piantissimo and Shadow Mario, but don't worry, you got me and my Rocket Nozzle to help you win.

Mario: I hope-a so, because I-a don't like-a the looks of this.

Pianta: Ok. Let's-

Mario: a-Go.

Pianta: I was about to say let's start, but that works too. On your marks... Get set... GOO!

Il Piantissimo: Woo! I'm gonna win.

Shadow Mario: ... (No you’re not, I am!)

Pianta: And it looks that Il Piantissimo is in the lead, followed by that mischievous Shadow Mario, and finally, in last place, is Mario.

Mario: Not-a for long.

Pianta: Amazing! Mario did a triple jump and then did a body slam and slid across Il Piantissimo.

Shadow Mario: ........... (GRRR! I CAN'T BE IN LAST! Time to cheat.)

Pianta: Shadow Mario triple jumped and got close to Il Piantissimo and tripped him. That had to hurt.

FLUDD: Mario, use my Rocket Nozzle now!

Pianta: Hey, you're not aloud to use help! That counts as cheating! You're disqua-

Doopliss: Body Steal!

Pianta: Hey, you stole my body! Give it back!

Doopliss: No way, Slick. Take this!

Pianta: Ugh... Ow...

Doopliss knocked out the Pianta.

Goombella: Well that is mean, but we had no choice, Mario was going to be disqualified.


Doopliss: Mario NOT OUT!

All the racers arrive in Corona Mountain.

Doopliss: Mario is in first, Shadow Mario is in second, and Il Piantissimo is in third.

Il Piantissimo: Grr. You want to cheat, Shadow Mario? Well I can too.

Shadow Mario: ... (NNNNOOOO)!

Mario: Did-a Il Piantissimo push-a Bowser Jr. into the-a lava?

FLUDD: Yes, be careful, Mario. He is dangerous.

Il Piantissimo: Your turn, Mario.

Mario: AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! No you don't!

Il Piantissimo: AHHHH NNNNNOOOO!

FLUDD: Good job, Mario. You dodged his push and made him fall in the lava.

Mario: That-a was a close-a call. Now let's make it to the finish.

Mario finally makes to the finish, where he is awarded with the second Crystal Star by Doopliss.

Luigi: Umm... This is weird, but another portal appeared. Well let's go to the next world.

Mario: Let's-a go.

In the portal...

Everyone: AAAAAHHHHHH!!!

Read on!

Comments, suggestions, stories, or story ideas? Email me!
Go back to Lemmy's Fun Fiction.
Go back to my main page.