The Grand Adventure of Mario and Kazooie

By Spiker Koopa

Chapter 8: Rusty Bucket at Bay

Mario: All right, see any unfinished paintings, guys?

Luigi: Um, paintings?

Kazooie: Oh yeah, in this world, we collect Jiggies and Notes to open doors and portals to other worlds.

Luigi: Why don’t you just go to the top of Grunty’s tower without going to any worlds?

Mario: ‘Cause each step we take to the top, we need Notes for the locked doors. And to get the Notes we need Jiggies, so that’s the system!

Luigi: Oh. Well then, I saw a big ship painting to the left of the closed door thingy.

Kazooie: That’s the portal to Rusty Bucket Bay! Let’s go to that painting then!

The gang run over to an incomplete photo and put in 6 Jiggies, and it then opens up the portal to Rusty Bucket Bay. Mario, Kazooie, and Luigi appear in front of a huge ship stuck in a small bay.

Mario: Hey, I guess this must be Rusty Bucket Bay.

Luigi: Huh. So, what boss will be here?

Mario: We’ve fought mostly Koopaling bosses, and since this seems like a bay, I suspect the boss around here is Wendy.

Luigi: Okay, let’s do our best, team!

Kazooie: ...

Mario: Well, it seems like my bro is the teammate with the most spirit here KAZOOIE...

Kazooie: Huh, sorry. Go Team M A R I O!!!

Mario: Better...

Mario and the gang walk forward to the "Rusty Bucket" and collect 5 Notes on the way onto the ship. They then look around and find a porthole to hit, which breaks and shows a way into a room called "Captain’s room".

Mario: It looks like there are five more Notes in here. See anything else?

Luigi: NOOOOO!!!

Kazooie: What? You just realized that you will always be in your brother’s shadow and you can’t do anything about it?

Luigi: No, worse! Wendy got here!

Luigi is pointing to a frame with a picture of Wendy Koopa taped to it.

Mario: Drat! That means she must be around this ship!

Luigi: No no no!

Kazooie: Mario, what’s with your brother?

Mario: He hates Wendy ‘cause Wendy once threatened to destroy all bagels, and Luigi loves bagels.

Kazooie: Oh, okay. Well, let’s get out of this room and go explore some more!

The gang leave with five more Notes and go to the back of the ship, where they find a number square that leads to another secret.

Mario: So how should we crack this code?

Kazooie: I always went with 12321 as my lucky numbers. That, and a witch will destroy me one day...

Mario: Fortune cookie?

Kazooie: Yeah. Who knew they could be so right?

Mario puts in the digits and a foghorn blows in the heroes’ ears.

Mario: Ow! That was wrong. At least the 1232 was correct... How many digits are there?

Kazooie: Hee hee! Only 4, I just wanted your eardrums to explode!

Mario: ...

Mario puts in the four digits and it chimes correctly. A crate opens, releasing a Jiggie.

Mario: I got it!

Luigi: Wahoo!

Kazooie: Breee!

Mario: Okay, saying our famous quotes is over now.

The gang leave that part of the ship and go into an evil pipe, which blows them back out and tries to eat them, although I don’t know why it tried to spit them out in the first place. Anyway, they go into another pipe and enter into a kitchen.

Mario: Hey, there are a lot of microwaves and stuff here...

Luigi: And Koopa chefs?!

Mario and the gang hide in a microwave that has never been used, and watch as Wendy comes along and talks to the chefs.

Wendy: Is my five-star meal done yet? I want it delivered to my room, pronto!

Koopa Chef 1: In a minute. It takes forever to make a good omelets out of a Kazoo egg.

Kazooie: SUPER ANGRY!!!

Wendy: I don’t care about that, what about my bagel and spaghetti?

Luigi: AND SHE SAID SHE HATES BAGELS!!!

Mario: Let’s calm dow-  HOW DARE YOU EAT SPAGHETTI WHEN I CAN’T EAT IT?!

Mario holds back everyone from attacking Wendy too soon. Wendy eventually leaves and the Mario Bros. and Kazooie get out of the microwave.

Koopa Chef 1: Hey! No visitors!

Kazooie: We ain’t visitors! We are the head chefs!

???: Impossible, I am the head chef!

A big Koopa shows up in front of the visitors.

Kent C. Koopa: Now, how may I help you?

Mario: Um, did Kazooie say we were chefs? No, she meant we were sent here by Grunty to pick up any Notes and Jiggies.

Koopa Chef 1: Oh, well, here is a Jiggy we found-

Kent C. Koopa: How do we know if you are lying to us?

Mario: We got invitations from Grunty to bring us here!

Mario quickly draws fake notes and shows them to Kent, who can’t really tell due to his poor eyesight.

Kent C. Koopa: Hmm, you can’t argue with notes... Go ahead... Take all the Notes here.

Luigi: Oh, and can I have that bagel?

Luigi snatches the bagel that the chefs were making.

Mario: Well, we will collect the Notes and be on our way then.

Mario and the gang take all 15 Notes and the Jiggy out of the room. On their way out they find a Jinjo and take him as well. They go towards the rear of the ship and see a TNT crate hovering above a sealed room. They decide to go there later and go collect some more Notes. They find 25 more Notes and 2 more Jiggies from their search, and they get off the boat and are near a house that can only be entered by going underwater.

Mario: Say, I wonder what is under that house? I think there might be some more Notes and a Jiggy!

Luigi: I see a blue Jinjo down there under the water!

Mario and the gang go into the scummy water and grab the Jinjo. They also head to the house. They enter to the house and climb onto a small boat.

Mario: I see a Jiggy by the ceiling!

Luigi: UM, I SEE WORSE!!!

A big shark starts to swim around the heroes.

Snapper: Heya, red plumber and bird... Remember me? Snapper will bring tea and cookies next time!

Mario: It’s Snapper! What are you doing here? And how did you get here from the other world?

Snapper: Well, it was easy, Snapper swam two miles toward some odd scummy place, Snapper then found Rusty Bucket Bay to live in for now. Snapper sees Skinny green stache! Man, he must be a veggie....

Luigi: I read that!

Snapper: Don’t care, Snapper will beat you this time! Um, I got nothing to say!

Mini Boss Battle!: Snapper the Shark

Snapper: This is for the last time we fought!

Snapper tries to bite Luigi and Mario, but misses more than 3 times. Mario uses his INF Ice Flower to shoot an iceball at the shark, freezing him. Luigi then jumps in the air and ground pounds Snapper, leaving a bruise on his head.

Snapper: OWIE, Snapper must destroy the green bean! Or maybe have him as salad...

Snapper rushes toward Luigi and eats him.

Mario: Hey! I’m going to make you spit him out and beg for mercy!

Mario takes out Kazooie and runs into the water and beak-smashes Snapper, making him spit out Luigi. Mario throws another iceball at Snapper, freezing him again. Mario then walks onto the block of ice holding Snapper and uses Kazooie once more to drill into Snapper, turning him into 5 small Snappers that run away and leave behind a Jiggy.

Mario: We did it! Now Kazooie, can you go get the Jiggy by the ceiling?

Kazooie: Sure!

Kazooie flies and collects the 3rd Jiggy and 5 Notes around the ship. She then returns to Mario’s backpack.

Luigi: Let’s get out of here now!

Mario and the gang leave the house and walk around the level, finding 5 more Notes and another Jinjo. Then they walk back onto the boat and go through a small door that leads to a lot of pipes and fans.

Mario: Mamamia! There are a lot of fans… And I thought Clanker had a lot of Notes!

Luigi: Well, I think we should keep going straight!

The gang run and dodges 1 fan and have to go over a rotating path. They barely make it without falling to their deaths, and pick up 5 more Notes. After they go through that, they go left at a fork and grab 4 more Notes and go across a rotating lever again, but Kazooie falls.

Luigi: NOOOOOO!

Mario: She’s okay, she can fly back into my backpack...

Kazooie: Yeah, it’s okay, Green Bean!

Luigi: I want a new nickname!

Kazooie: Either that or the Greenonator.

Luigi: I like the Greenon-

Kazooie: Green Bean it is!

The gang finish their conversation and walk all the way to the next Jiggy and take it. They leave the room and enter another that says "Control room". They collect the 10 Notes in it and look around...

Mario: See anything?

Luigi: Nope. I see a panel and a wall, but oth-

Mario: Let me break the wall!

Mario punches the wall but hurts his hand. He then uses Kazooie on the wall, which breaks and reveals a Jiggy and another Jinjo.

Mario: All right! Let’s get out of here! But first, let’s see what happens with pressing these buttons.

Mario presses the panel buttons and something outside goes KER CLUNK! Mario and the gang run outside and into the water and see that an anchor has been let down on a dolphin.

Clapper: Owie! It hurts a lot! Why did that brat come in with this girly and mean ship?!

Mario: What do you mean, this isn’t the original Rusty Bucket?

Clapper: Y-yes, it is, but my friend said that a weird turtle came and invaded the ship and claimed it for her own. I bet she was waiting to get my friend so she had to stop me from protecting him!

Luigi: Who is your friend?

Clapper: His name is Jinjy the Jinjo, he says he has a part of a thingy called a Jiggy.

Mario: That’s who we are looking for! Can he come with us?

Clapper: No, he is my bestest friend, I won’t let him go. And besides, my brother Snapper is mean enough! I would go nuts without Jinjy!

Mario: We have three of his friends! He needs to help us, with him we can turn this place back to normal!

Clapper: First get me out of this pit made by the anchor...

Mario runs down into the water and tries to pull the anchor off of Clapper, but instead he gives up and gets out of the water and onto the boat. He finds a crane and uses its claw to pick up the anchor and move it somewhere else.

Clapper: All right! Thanks! Here is an odd thing I call Clapper’s gold statue!

Clapper gives the gang a Jiggy and they then get onto some driftwood.

Mario: Now let’s go to that sealed room!

The gang get back on land and walk to the sealed room and beak-smash it to open the door to it. Inside they see 25 Notes and take the 4th Jinjo, and they then see an odd, huge box...

Mario: Let’s see what is in that box!

Mario opens it and a huge hole leading to the water is revealed. Then Wendy rushes in.

Wendy: Well, if it isn’t the Mario Brothers and that odd bird!

Kazooie: Grr! Well, let’s go right now!

Wendy: Alone? With three oddjobs? How about I bring a friend?

The water hole turns into a whirlpool and Snapper appears.

Wendy: In fact, to make this fair...

Wendy waves her wand and Snapper’s gills become able to breathe air. Snapper also starts to walk on his tail and turns into CHOMPER....

KOOPALING /BOSS BATTLE!!!: Wendy Koopa and Chomper the thought bubble shark thing...

Chomper runs at Mario and grabs him and throws him into the wall. Mario gets back up with a little hesitation to move after the hard throw. Luigi takes out a hammer from his pocket and throws it at Chomper’s head, which only makes Chomper more angry.

Chomper: Grr... No small hammer can hurt me! Methinks I need more power!

Wendy: Here, some more power!

Wendy makes Chomper into another form, where he is buffed out and ready to destroy. He also has black Jr. bracelets.

Biter: Grr, ThAnKs... Losing calm... thought bubble power....

Biter gets angrier at Luigi and throws him at Mario. Mario catches Luigi in time and takes an Ice Flower out for the Bros. They then throw the ice at Biter, who freezes for 2 seconds. Mario takes out Kazooie and drills her into the ice block. Biter gets stung by that high-damage attack.

Wendy: Oh no! I need maximum power! Or my bros. will say I TOLD YOU SO!

Wendy waves her wand at Biter and uses almost all of her magic to turn Biter into Cruncher, a red, maxed out shark with Bowser bracelets.

Cruncher: DESTROY RED AND GREEN!!! DESTROY RED AND GREEN!!!

Cruncher gets a huge crate and throws it at Luigi, who faints after the hard knockout with the crate. Lemmy jumps out of the crate.

Lemmy: Wahoo! What’s happening?

Mario: Urrgh... Snapper turned into Chomper, who turned into Biter, who finally transformed into Cruncher...

Lemmy: In other words, Snapper turned into that huge thing?

Mario: Yeah... It might take some time to restore my health with a Mushroom... Can you distract him?

Lemmy: Sure! Hey Muscle Shark! Look what I can do!

Lemmy does the take off thumb trick to Cruncher.

Lemmy: Wanna know how I did it?

Cruncher: FOUR GENERATIONS OF INBREEDING? ... Bananas? ...

Mario finally eats the Life Shroom and picks up Luigi and feeds him one too. They then throw some iceballs at Cruncher, who freezes for 5 more seconds. Wendy gets really angry at the Mario Bros. and throws some magic rings like she did in SMB3. The Mario Bros. dodge every one of the rings. Lemmy rushes past Cruncher and takes Wendy’s wand and uses it on a random dolphin. Unfortunately for Cruncher, it is his brother Clapper, who turns into Mega Smacker.

Mega Smacker: I’M HUUGE! WHERE IS MY BROTHER?!

Cruncher: ERRRRM... LOOKS LIKE ALL THOSE YEARS OF BULLYING CLAPPER ARE GOING TO COME BACK... AW MAN!

Cruncher tries to throw a huge water bomb to finish off the Mario Bros. before he is captured by his brother. He only hits Kazooie, so Mega Smacker takes Cruncher and almost leaves.

Mega Smacker: TIME TO HAVE A TALK WITH MR. FISTY AND HIS FRIEND, CARL!!!

Cruncher: WHO’S CARL? Who?

Mega Smacker pulls out a sock puppet.

Mario: Have a nice chat!

Luigi: See you next fall!

Kazooie: Urrgh... That doesn’t make any sense...

Mario: Oh. Have a nice trip?

Kazooie: Uggh...

Snapper turns back to normal. Clapper stays in his new form because he has Wendy’s wand. They then leave.

Wendy: NO NO NO! I can’t lose!

Mario: Well, you just lost!

Wendy: But... I never lose! I might run away, but I never lose!

Lemmy: Well, why don’t you do what everyone does and run? And Leave behind a Jinjo and a Jiggy.

Wendy takes Lemmy’s advice and runs to a warp pipe that stays only for Wendy. She leaves behind a Jiggy and a Jinjo.

Mario and Luigi: Wahoo!

Lemmy: Great! Now, can I join again?

Mario: I say yes! As long as you don’t leave like Ludwig did!

Lemmy: Nah, I won’t. Lemmy’s Land is in danger!

OLD FRIEND ADDED!: Lemmy Koopa

Lemmy: Now, let’s get out of here and exit the world!

Kazooie: I feel better from that attack now, ‘cause of it’s water effect!

Mario: Let me guess, all it did was throw some water at you?

Kazooie: Yep. We need to ask Clapper for the Jinjo so we can have all Jiggies and Notes!

Luigi: Well look! A letter!

Luigi picks up the letter and reads it out loud.

Dear friends, This is Clapper, I am currently paying back my brother what he deserves. Anyway, I heard from my friend that he wanted to help you guys out, so at the bottom is a Jinjo, I hope he helps out with the adventure of stopping Grunty!   -Clapper

Lemmy: Yay! He left a Jinjo for us! Now we’ve got all the Jiggies and can leave!

Mario and the gang exit the world. They then leave that part of Grunty’s lair and enter a forest-like room where they find a picture that needs 9 Jiggies. They put it in and get ready to enter a new level.

Meanwhile...

Grunty: Wow, you Koopalings are really bad at beating Mario and friends... So what’s the next plan for the level at the end?

Larry: Well, me and Ludwig decided that everyone would take all the Jiggies out of that world and since it is a forest, I would be the boss, at least the final boss of that level.

Ludwig: Yeah, we are going as these teams: Spring team, Iggy and Roy; Summer team, Morton and Wendy; Fall team: Bowser and Jr; and Winter team: me and Larry. If we all lose, I’ve got a special plan to destroy the Mario Bros!

Bowser: Graaggh! Why did Lemmy join back?!

Grunty: Um-Bum-

A pot comes to Grunty’s room and talks to the Koopalings.

Dingpot: She was going to takeover Lemmy’s Land...

Bowser: Fine, when you are done getting Lemmy back, you can have his site...

Ludwig: So, are we ready to go to the final level?

Everyone: Ready!

And finally, Lemmy, Luigi, and Kazooie are ready to help Mario go to the final level- What’s that? You want to know who the secret boss is? Let’s say it is a plant, and is from a game with the initials DWM and the plant’s type is rose! Try to figure out the ultra boss before I submit the next part! GET OUT OF HERE, unless you are still reading on.

Read on!


 
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