The Grand Adventure of Mario and Kazooie

By Spiker Koopa

Chapter 9: Click-Clock Woods: The Time is Running Out

Mario and the gang appear in the middle of the 4 small levels.

Mario: Now then, where is the entrance to the last level?

Kazooie: How about over there with that big stump?

Luigi: All right then, letís go in and finish this adventure up!

The Gang walk into the stump and warp to Click-Clock Woods. They then look around and see four doors.

Mario: How about we split up into teams and wait for each other to open the rest of these doors?

Luigi: Okay, I call Kazooie! No switches!

Kazooie: AWWWW, I have to be with the Green Bean!

Lemmy: Big whoop, I have to be with the Mushroom Muncher!

Mario: Well then, if the teams are decided, letís-a go!

The gang split up into teams and decide that Mario and Lemmy will go through the spring and fall doors.

PART 1: Spring-Time Fun

Mario: All right, now letís try and find all the Jig-

Iggy appears out of nowhere.

Iggy: Iím back, you pesky plumber!

Mario: Grrr, you are supposed to be defeated once!

Lemmy: Hey Bro.

Iggy: Hey Lemmy. Anyway, I came here to tell you we made sure you wonít be getting any sort of Jiggies, Instead, just try and beat all of us!

Lemmy: All?

Roy appears out of nowhere too.

Roy: Yeah, all of us. In the other doors, there are more of us Koopalings!

Mario: So you guys took all the Jiggies...

Roy: Pretty much. See you on the flipside!

Roy grabs Iggy and warps to the top of the tree.

Mario: Well that messes up a lot of stuff, but at least we have notes to collect!

Mario and Lemmy head out onto the tree and collect 5 notes. They then head around to Mumboís Hut.

Lemmy: Should we go in there?

Mario: Ehh... I guess we put off visiting him in the last couple of worlds, so why not?

Mario grabs a red feather off the top of the hut and then heads inside with Lemmy.

Mumbo: Zzz...

Mario: Um, hel-

Mumbo wakes up.

Mumbo: What does silly plumber want...?

Mario: Um, hi there. I know we havenít visited you in the past worlds, but I wanted to know what you can do.

Mumbo: Well I can make funny transforma-

Lemmy: I could do that! Anything else?

Mumbo: I could offer you a powerful transformation spell. You will have to go back to the sandcastle in the beach world though...

Mario: Okay, weíll go over there and hit the sand letters again later on.

Mumbo: Okay, here is the code: WISHYWASHYMARIO.

Mario: Okay... Sounds odd...

Lemmy: Letís get out of this place!

Mario and Lemmy walk out of Mumboís Hut and head up the tree in the middle of the level. On their way up they find 6 notes and beat up a Goomba.

Mario: Hmm...  Bowser must be bringing his troops from Plit...

Lemmy: Jeez, this might be bad, but I wonder how he would summon them...

Mario: Anyway, whatís up with the wooden boards here? Looks like there was supposed to be a fort or something like that...

Lemmy: Not sure...

Mario and Lemmy head up to the top of the tree and see a big egg. They gather the 14 notes around them and then crack the egg.

Eyrie: Cacaw! Me thank bear and bir- me mean, red man and funny-haired Tip-tupling

Mario: It was nothing really...

Lemmy: Literally!

Eyrie: Me go to sleep now...

The small eagle chick lays down in his nest and falls asleep.

Lemmy: That was it?

Mario: Well I guess so...

Lemmy: Well that as a waste of time; letís go up a little more to that door to give Roy what for!

Mario: That was a horrible rhyme, you sounded like Grunty...

Mario and Lemmy head up to the door, which is near the very tip top of the giga-sized tree.

Mario: I donít see anything... except for those two Jiggies!

Mario quickly grabs the two Jiggies. Suddenly Iggy and Roy pop out of nowhere and lock the door.

Roy: Ha-ha! Now then, prepare for a most epic pounding!

Iggy: Sorry Lemmy, itís just-

Roy: SHADDUP Iggy! Prepare for a pounding after this fight!


Roy jumps up into the air and tries to hit Lemmy, but misses and lands on the floor. Iggy is waving his wand at Mario and casting light blue shells towards him. Only one hits Mario while the others bounce around the room.

Roy: Get a load of this!

Roy turns the room into his warp pipe level from NSMBW. He then jumps into a pipe and suddenly jumps out another. landing on Lemmy.

Roy: Now then, wimp, take this beating like a real Koopa-

Mario grabs one of Iggyís shells and throws it at Roy, who lets go of Lemmy. Lemmy gets back up onto his yellow ball and waves his wand at Roy. Roy then gets trapped in a yellow rubber ball.

Roy: When I get out, you are going to pay, Mario!!!

Iggy pops the rubber ball and Roy jumps out. Roy then jumps back into the warp pipes and lands on Marioís head. Lemmy takes Marioís item bag and gives Mario the INF Fire Flower.

Iggy: Now hey there, thatís cheap!

Mario turns into Fire Mario and throws fireballs at Iggy and Roy. They faint after being hit by 15 of them individually.

Roy: Ouch... grrrrr... Here then, take the stupid Jiggies we were guarding!

Roy gets back up, punches Iggy in the gut, and makes him fork over a Jiggy. Shortly after, Roy gives a Jiggy too.

Mario: We got it!

Roy: Now then, Bro, letís run!

Roy makes a dark green warp pipe (most pipes are normal green) and takes Iggy along with him.

Lemmy: Now that we finished this world, letís go back and rest! Luigi and Kazooie will get along just fine...

Mario: *gulps like a madman* I hope they do...

Meanwhile the summer gate opens up and Luigi and Kazooie walk through.


Luigi: All right then, where should we go, Kazooie?

Kazooie: I donít know, Mario is the one who decides that.


Kazooie: SWAAAWWK!

Luigi: Ouch! That hurt my ears!

Kazooie: Well then, just try to lead then, Green Bean!

Luigi takes a Mushroom from the ground and eats it, he then becomes small.

Kazooie: Why did you have to go and eat the darned Mushroom...?

Luigi: It looked delicious!

Luigi finds another Mushroom and turns back to normal size. He then goes up onto the huge tree and collects 10 notes and a Feather, turning into Caped Luigi. They then fly around until they see a small lake.

Luigi: Hey Kazooie, look whatís swimming in there!


Luigi: No! Not Snapper, a beaver who looks like his home is blocked off by that boulder!

Kazooie: Well then, be a nice guy and go into the water! While youíre at it, go and smash that rock!

Luigi grabs Kazooie and beak smashes the rock underwater. Kazooie swims back up and starts to panic like a mad bird.

Luigi: Itís okay! Itís just water!!!

Kazooie: Ohhhh the hooooorrrrroooorrrr...

Kazooie flies onto a ledge and goes to sleep.

Luigi: Well then, Iíll go back with the beaver...

Beaver: Sorry, sir, but Iím afraid my house isnít ready at the moment... Come back in fall or winter, okay?

Luigi: Okay then, glad I could help!

Luigi heads back onto the tree, grabs Kazooie, and runs back up the path; on the way they find 3 worms, 10 notes, and 2 acorns.

Luigi: Hey Kazooie, I wonder what is built on that tree branch. Looks like an unfinished house...

Kazooie: Still hate you...

Luigi ignores Kazooie and heads up some more of the tree and finds 5 more notes, another acorn, and 4 more worms. They then find a slightly big baby eagle.

Eyrie: Me hungry! Plumber and turtle from the spring give me worms!

Luigi: Okay then, here you go!

Luigi feeds 3 worms to the baby. The baby grows bigger.

Eyrie: Thanks! Whatís your name?

Luigi: Luigi.

Eyrie: Thanks, Mama Luigi!

Luigi: Please... Never again should I be called thatÖ

Eyrie: Okay then, Mr. Green, me thank you and that other guy...

Eyrie falls asleep.

Kazooie: Huh? That was a waste of time... Give me the other worms, wimp!

Luigi: No! The worms must be some sort of food for him. You might not be nice enough, but I will feed him until he doesnít need it!

Luigi whistles and a letter bird appears out of nowhere. He then gives him a letter and a package to deliver.

Kazooie: Who are you sending it to?

Luigi: Mario, he will feed Eyrie enough for fall... and I gave him my acorns too. Letís keep going up!

Luigi and Kazooie head up to the door leading to the bosses. On their way they find 3 more worms before entering the door.

Luigi: Hello? Anyone in here?

Morton and Wendy pop out of nowhere and lock the door.

Morton: Well hello, plumber and bird. It seems as of today, we will be taking all of your Jiggies and notes that you guys have co-

Wendy: In short, letís fight right here and now!


Wendy: Have a ring!

Wendy pulls out a newer wand and zaps out some rings to bounce around the room. Luigi avoids them and ground pounds Morton. Half of Mortonís face turns red and he tries to ground smash Luigi and Kazooie. Luigi lifts into the air due as Kazooie picks him up..

Morton: Now then, I say thatís not fair! Since we lack the capacity to fly, I would suggest that you get down here and fight like a real plumber!

Luigi: Do you ever shut up?!

Luigi stops Kazooie from flying and uses her instead to beak smash Morton. Morton faints from the epicness of the battle.

Wendy: Well, he was of no use to me... How about some more rings!

Wendy pulls out some more rings that hit Kazooie, stopping her from flying. Luigi then runs up to Wendy and knocks her out with a bagel.

Luigi: That will teach you to mess with my little buddy Kazooie!

Kazooie: Thanks, I guess...

Wendy: ITíS NO FAAIIIIRRR!!! How come you keep beating me?!

Morton: Itís... Ďcause of his... ugggh...

Morton passes out again, and this time Wendy drops the 2 Jiggies and takes Morton into another dark green warp pipe.

Luigi: We did it!

Kazooie: I guess we did. I wonder whatís happening with Mario and Lemmy?

Mario: Hey, look over there! The fall world opened!

Lemmy: Well, letís-

The letter bird appears and gives Mario the letter and package.

Mario: Itís from Luigi! ďDear Mario, I have found that collecting worms will help Eyrie grow more and more! Here are some worms and acorns, hope you can make use of them!Ē Ö All right then! Letís go in and explore!


Lemmy: Where should we go this time?

Mario: I guess letís just keep going up this time!

Mario and Lemmy head back up on the tree. On their way they find a leaf for Mario to turn into Raccoon Mario, 11 more notes, 3 more worms, and 4 acorns. They count up their total and see they have 7 worms and 6 acorns. They head up some more and find that the treehouse is now just about finished.

Mario: Hey look! This place is just about complete!

Lemmy: Iíve got an idea; letís go with Luigi and Kazooie in the winter world!

The team head back up to another part of the tree and walk into a door with a squirrel laying inside.

Mario: What happened to you?

NabNuts: NabNuts ate too many acorns... I wonít have enough for my lady this winter if I donít get seven acorns...

Lemmy: We have six now, and I see one on your shelf!

NabNuts: Oh thanks, you two! NabNuts wonít be yelled at now! Here, have these two keys NabNuts found lying around!

NabNuts hands over two odd-looking keys to Mario and Lemmy.

Mario: Well good luck, and thanks!

Mario and Lemmy head out and up to the nest again while finding 14 notes.

Mario: Hi Eyrie! We brought you a gift from Luigi!

Mario hands 5 worms over to Eyrie. The baby then grows up to be even bigger than before.

Eyrie: Thanks a lot! Me now need sleep...

Eyrie falls asleep again.

Lemmy: ...

Mario: ...

Lemmy: Well, letís go beat up some more baddies then...

Mario and Lemmy head up to the door and walk through it. Suddenly the doors become locked again just for the battle.

Bowser: MUHAHAHA! Surprised to see me, Mario?

Mario: Nah, not really. If it were Peach, then yeah, sure.

Bowser: Well, things wonít be the same after I destroy you!

Bowser Jr: And me! Prepare yourself, Lemmy, for the great beyond!

Lemmy: SMRPG line... very nice. Letís just get this battle over with so I can save my site!

BOWSER FIGHT 1!!!: Bowser and Bowser Jr.

Bowser spits out some fireballs aimed for Mario. Mario jumps over them and smacks Bowser Jr. with his raccoon tail.


Lemmy: Itís no wonder why you are such a baby...

Bowser: Donít talk like that to your brother, Lemmy!

Bowser goes into his shell and spins around Mario, hitting him once. Mario loses his Raccoon Suit. While that is happening, Lemmy throws rubber balls at Bowser Jr, who tries to avoid them. Mario ground pounds Bowser on the head and then proceeds to grab his tail and throw him into Bowser Jr.

Bowser: GRAAAGGGHHHH!!! How did we lose so fast?!

Mario: Because of my buddy here!

Bowser: Grr, fine then, Mario. Take the stupid Jiggy-thingamabob...

Bowser hands over two Jiggies and takes his son into a dark green warp pipe, which magically disappears....

Lemmy: We did it!

Mario: And we got it! Now, letís go tell Luigi whatís up...

Mario and Lemmy head out the door, down the tree, and out of the world. They find Luigi and Kazooie relaxing in the middle of the level.

Luigi: Hey guys, how are you doing?

Mario: Doing well, so far weíve collected 75 notes, 6 Jiggies, and some other various stuff.

Kazooie: I suppose we are going to go into the winter world now?

Mario: Yep, but we are all going in this time. Lemmy and I want to see what kinds of changes there will be this time.

Luigi: I canít wait to see Eyrie!

Mario and the whole gang run towards the last part of the level, eager to finish up their tough journey.


Mario: Wow, looks like everything is destroyed here, attacked by the snow...

Lemmy: I think Larry and Ludwig are left for us to beat! So they must be up at the top!

Luigi: Hold it! Before we go, I need to visit a friend first!

Everyone: Huh?

The gang follow Luigi to a small hole in a frozen lake.

Luigi: I promised a friend that I would visit him during winter.

Mario: Iíll come with you.

Lemmy: Me too!


Kazooie flies up onto a nearby ledge and has a tantrum.

Mario: Whatís her problem?

Luigi: She hates water...

Everyone except Kazooie heads into the water hole and finds a small path leading into the tree. They follow it and find themselves in a small little home.

Beaver: Hi Luigi! Thanks for keeping your promise and visiting me!

Luigi: Not a problem!

Mario: Hi, Iím Mario!

Lemmy: And Iím Lemmy!

Beaver: Nice to meet you guys, and hey Lemmy, I checked out your site recently, itís having just a few problems...

Lemmy: What?! What do you mean?!

Beaver: Well... Iíll show you on my computer...

Mario: Beavers have Internet access?

Beaver: You betcha!

The Beaver pulls out his laptop and shows the gang that Lemmyís Land is now called Gruntyís Garden.

Lemmy: Oh... my... DAD... Itís absolutely horrible! And look! It got 2 awards?!

One of the awards features a picture of the Earth with a big X across it, called Worldís Worst!!! The other shows a picture of a trophy bag being stolen away, called Most Rewards Taken Away from One Site.

Lemmy: We have to get it back before it gets even worse!!!

Mario: Then we need to leave a little early. Sorry, Mr. Beaver...

Beaver: Hey, no problems! I would love to see Lemmyís Land turn back to normal! Well, I guess this is goodbye, Luigi. Before you guys go, you can have my trophy, called INF Jiggy...

Mario: Really? Thanks a lot! We will need that-

Luigi: I canít possibly accept that! We have to get all 100 Jigsaws first. But Iíll take it after this whole thing blows off.

Beaver: Luigi, you are so kindÖ Well anyway, see you later!

The gang leave the den and head back up the tree, meeting back up with Kazooie.

Kazooie: How did it go?

Mario and Lemmy stare angrily at Luigi...

Luigi: Mr. Beaver was going to give us an INF Jiggy, but I told him to keep it until we beat this whole journey.

Kazooie: You are sooooooommmmeee kind of stupid... We could have been done if you hadnít done that!

Luigi: I was being nice!

Mario: Well I suppose this wouldnít be much of an adventure if we didnít collect Jiggies.

Lemmy: Yeah, you could be right! And I find that itís more fun trying to get all the pieces!

Luigi: Yay! Iím forgiven-

Kazooie: Not by me, Green Bean!

Mario: Anyway, letís-a go!

The Gang go up the whole tree, collecting the remaining 25 notes, then head into the door, which once again gets locked. Only this time, it is locked with iron bars.

Mario: Iíve got a bad feeling about this...

Luigi: Look over there! Itís another dark green warp pipe!

Kazooie: Yeah, but look, itís locked!

Mario pulls out one of the odd keys and unlocks the warp pipe. They then head down it and fall into a huge forest battlefield.

Mario: Where are we?

Kazooie: Looks barren to me, even though itís bristling with roses...

Lemmy: Hey look! It looks like there are some plants growing over there! Thatís odd, they got Ludwig and Lar- Oh, and here we go again...

Ludwig and Larry pop out of the ground.

Larry: Surprised, guys?

Ludwig: Well I am sorry, guys, but I had to join the evil side again!

Lemmy: Traitor!

Luigi: Lord of the Lies!

Ludwig: Hey now, donít call out names! Gruntilda was the one who put us here to make an awesome boss fight!

Larry: And even then, Bowser is the one who will be the ruler!

Ludwig: So really, you guys are just a bunch of meddlesome fools!

Mario: This whole thing... is just a scheme of Bowserís?

Ludwig: Yep. And yet, I fear that there is a greater power behind our own dad!

Larry: So instead, we are taking over this whole lair with our army!

Mario: Get on with it!


A gigantic, huge, hulking, oversized, large beyond life Piranha Plant comes out of the ground.


Larry: Scary, isnít he? He truly is my grandest creation ever! To think he appeared in that foolish game Dragon Warrior Monsters! Oh yeah, he is just lying by the way, he isnít all that powerful...

Mario: This is worse than Megabutt!

Kazooie: Worse than Godara the Destructor!

Luigi: I think I like Boos now...



RoseVine tries to whip Mario with his thorny vines multiple times, but fails to do so and only hits him once. Lemmy tries to throw rubber balls at the behemoth, but the balls pop due to RoseVineís thorns. Luigi pulls out a Fire Flower and uses it to set fire to RoseVine. It does minimal damage and only destroys one out of a thousand of his vines.

Luigi: Hey guys, we should try to set fire to the plant! I know Lemmy can breathe fire, but Mario and Kazooie, letís use that INF Fire Flower!

Kazooie: Well what good will that do if it only hurts him by like 0.2 percent?

Mario: If we did that same attack thousands of time, it could equal up to 100!

Mario and Kazooie take out the Fire Flower and use it again to become fiery versions of them. They then proceed to shoot fireballs at parts of RoseVine, while Lemmy shoots his fireballs at RoseVineís tongue.


Larry: This isnít good at all!!! Ludwig! Letís go help him out instead of hiding behind this tree!

Ludwig: I am calculating that if they keep up with all of these attacks, they could beat RoseVine in no time!

Larry and Ludwig run up to Mario and Luigi and conk them on the head. Lemmy stops attacking RoseVine and instead attacks Larry. They get in a fight while Luigi gets back up and throws a fireball at Ludwig. Ludwig laughs at Luigi, however that laugh is quickly disrupted by a barrage of fireballs. Ludwig drops a Jiggy.

Ludwig: Ouch...

Lemmy rejoins the others after defeating his younger brother, and gives Mario a hand in getting back up. They then start to shoot fireballs at RoseVineís main thorn hands, which burn up, leaving him unable to attack.

Luigi: Let me help out too!

Kazooie: And me!

Kazooie and Luigi start to shoot even more fireballs at RoseVineís thorny legs.


RoseVine uses his gigantic tongue to eat Kazooie and swallows her whole.

Luigi: NOOOO!!!

RoseVine then eats up Mario and Lemmy.

RoseVine: YOUíRE NEXT-

A giant Eagle flies onto the battlefield and drills his beak into RoseVine, making him spit out the gang and even the rest of the Bowser family.

Mario: How did you guys get here?

Iggy: We... we came into this place and then RoseVine ate us. He said he wouldnít eat his creators, so that left us in a horrible place...

Mario: Well you guys just lay on the ground; me and Kazooie will finish this up!

Eyrie: Luigi! Did I help out?

Luigi: *sniffle...* You helped us out more than ever! I knew raising you was a good idea!

Mario and Kazooie fly up into the air and throw a final fireball at RoseVine. RoseVine catches on fire and quickly fades away. He leaves a Jiggy for the gang, and Mario and Luigi pick it up together.

Mario and Luigi: We Got It!!!

Lemmy: Now that weíve got 92 Jiggies and 900 notes, can we go ahead and beat Grunty so I can have my site back?

Mario: Wow, we sure did collect a lot of stuff from all the worlds...

The rest of the Koopa family sneak away and head into a warp pipe that stays only for them.

Lemmy: Of course my family runs away like usual...

Mario: Letís head back the same way we came in, and get out of here!

The gang leave and head out of the whole level. They prepare themselves for the final levels.


Grunty: When my schemes and trap fails, I get mad. But I ask of you Bowser... it seems you have been had!

Bowser: Well, not necessarily. Iím going to show you whoís boss around here!

Bowser snaps his fingers and a whole squad of Koopatrols run in and grab Grunty.

Grunty: Oof! What is this, an attack? If I get out of here, I will give you such a smack!!!

The guards take Grunty away to a jail cell somewhere.

Bowser: Well then. How is the magic supply here, Kamek?

Kamek: It can last for years to come! We could summon the whole Mushroom Kingdom or even merge this world with ours!

Bowser: Good to know! And General... How are the troops preparing?

???: Quite well, my Lord... The Troopa Koopa force will be ready to launch its most deadly weapon...

Kamek: Say... Remind me your name?

???: ...

Bowser: Err, itís okay, we know you are the general after all!

???: Well I should prepare myself...

The shady general leaves the throne room of Gruntyís lair.

Bowser: Right... Anyway, prepare for Mario, guys! Muhaahahahaha!

And there you have it, the chapter is now complete. In the next chapter there will be even more exciting stuff happening. like Gruntyís Furnace Fun. But I wonder, that mysterious Koopa... nah! Anyway, perhaps Bowser will rule over the Isle-O-Hags region forever! Or will he? Keep reading to find out...

Read on!

Comments, suggestions, stories, or story ideas? Email me!
Go back to Lemmy's Fun Fiction.
Go back to my main page.