The Amazing Race MK II

By Giga Bowser NS

Episode 7
Title: Usually when I do that, tires come out

Phil: Previously on… The Amazing Race MK: Teams continued to race through the majestic Rainbow Road! A tough Detour choice shuffled the teams’ positions around, but Dixie & Tiny managed to come out on top. However, before being able to check into the Pit Stop, they had to perform an insane stunt called a Star Dive.


Phil: Tensions rose at the back of the pack.

Iggy: You’re a dumb *bleep*!

Phil: And although Xoshi finally discovered his own powers, he and his partner Foshi were eliminated. Now… six teams remain… Who will be eliminated… next?

The opening plays with a new Red X over Foshi & Xoshi

Phil: This… is Rainbow Road! A spectacular manifestation of pure stardust… that has been turned into a world-renowned race course. This famous area, featured in every single Mario Grand Prix to date… was the fifth Pit Stop… in a race around the world. Teams arrived here for a mandatory rest period. Will Kat & Ana and Dixie & Tiny, the race’s longest lasting alliance by far, manage to stick together? Dixie & Tiny, who arrived first at 12:09 AM, will depart… at 12:09 PM.


Dixie: Take a charter bus to the Forbidden Forest and make your way to… *gasp* Luigi’s Mansion!

Phil: Teams must now make their way down Star Road to Mushroom City below. Then, they must find this bus depot, where they will sign up for one of three charter busses to this place: the infamous Luigi’s Mansion. Supposedly haunted by tons of ghosts, it is at the front gates that teams will find their next clue.

Dixie: Wow! Luigi’s Mansion!

Tiny: Didn’t that place, like… disappear?

Dixie: I don’t know. If we’re going there, then I guess it came back. C’mon! Let’s move!

Tiny: Wow… This place certainly loses its charm in the daytime…


Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas - 12:11 PM
Kat: Oh, yes! This should be fun. A large, dark mansion, a ninja’s best friend.

Ana: Should be mysterious…

Kat: Well, come on! Let’s hurry!

***Kat: If we can keep up the pace we’ve set, then we should be just fine.

Ana: Catch the girls!

Kat: I have a feeling it’s gonna be a fun day.

Koops: *Yawn*

Kooper: Wake up, buddy! We’ve got a big day ahead of us.

***Koops: After the over-excitement of last leg, I slept like a log. Kooper just barely woke me up in time for our checkout.


Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends - 12:28PM

Koops: Awww, *bleep*!

Kooper: Heh! Oh, boy! A haunted house! Sounds awesome!

Koops: *exhale* Okay, I can do this. I did Hooktail’s Castle… I did Creepy Steeple… I’ll be fine.

Kooper: You bet you will! Come on! Let’s grab a bus!

Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners - 12:32 PM
Paratroopa: All right! It’s a new day! Where we goin’?

Koopa: Luigi’s Mansion ho!

Paratroopa: Woah! That should be cool…

Koopa: Let’s get going!

***Koopa: We don’t really like where we’re sitting right now. We’d like to move up in the pack a little bit.

Paratroopa: Luigi’s Mansion, here we come!

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters

Dixie: Is this the bus depot?

Tiny: Look like it, Sis!

The bell on the depot’s door jingles as they enter.

Dixie: Look! There’s the signup sheet! We’re first, girl!

Tiny: (scribbling their names) Excellent!

Dixie: Hey, wait… what’s this say down here?

Tiny: (squinting) Note: Fast Forward ahead.

Phil: This… is the first of only two Fast Forwards hidden on the entire race! The first team that finds it and completes it… can skip all tasks and proceed directly to the Pit Stop. However, on this particular leg, the instructions to the Fast Forward will not be as easy to obtain. While on the bus trip to the mansion, teams will make a scheduled stop at a refuelling station and diner. The clue box with the Fast Forward is hidden away somewhere at this rest stop.

Dixie: Hm. Well, I guess we’ll have to look out for that.

Tiny: Odd that they would tell us now…

Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers - 12:45 PM

Iggy: Ooh! Good rip!

Lemmy: … Make your way to Luigi’s Mansion! Hm…

Iggy: Oh, yeah! That’s where Dad hired King Boo! That certainly didn’t turn out well.

Lemmy: Yeah, too bad that giant Bowser costume was destroyed! It was sweet!

***Iggy: Me ‘n my brother had a major setback last leg. We had to take the slow route, and as a result, we’re leaving second to last. It’s a good thing we have a cushion behind us.

***Lemmy: We don’t like Booster and Snifit. We hope they’ll be eliminated!

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Ana: Heeeeey girls!

Kat: Looks like we’re going to be on the same bus!

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Dixie: Hi!!! There’s a Fast Forward on this leg!

Kat: Where?

Tiny: We don’t know. It’s “ahead”…

Kat: Hm… Well, we’re on bus one. Together again!

Dixie: Onward! Hahahaa!

Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Snifit: Ugh… Booster! Please stop licking the track…

Booster: But it tastes lyke rainbows!

Snifit: Right…

(Riiiiiiiip) - 12:55 PM

Snifit: Okay, Booster! We’re going on a bus!

Booster: A bus?!

Snifit: Yes… a bus…

***Snifit: … What?! We can’t be funny ALL of the time!

Snifit: Well, let’s go! Hopefully we can avoid elimination once again!

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
The camera shifts and we see the bus start up.

Kat: Okay, girls! The bus has started, and we are ready to go!

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Dixie: Oh, boy! I hope it isn’t too scary!

Kat: I can’t wait! I love shadowy places!

Dixie: You’re certainly brave!

Tiny: Come on, ladies! Let’s leave!

Dixie: All right! Bye, Rainbow Road!
Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends

Kooper: Oh here it is!

Koops: Where?



Kooper: Hahahaa! Right there!

Koops is panting.

Kooper: Who is that?

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
All four are waving out the window.

Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends
Kooper: Ah! We missed the first bus. Oh, well! Let’s go signup!

First Bus to Luigi’s Mansion – Kat & Ana, Dixie & Tiny (1:00 PM)

Kooper: Hey, look! There’s gonna be a Fast Forward!

Koops: Hm. That could come in handy.

Kooper: Yeah… Hey, what’s this? Hey, Koops! You got the fanny pack?

Koops: Yes, why?

Kooper: Look! Someone left theirs behind…

Both: …

Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners
Koopa: Hey-oh!

Kooper: Hey, dudes!

Paratroopa: What’s new?

Kooper: Well, we’re together on the second bus, there’s gonna be a Fast Forward later, and someone left their fanny pack behind.

Paratroopa: Wow. No one ever says that much when I ask what’s new…

Koopa: Uh… 1: Yay! 2: Do you know where it is? 3: Whose is it?

Kooper: 1: Glad to have ya. 2: “Ahead”, apparently. 3: No idea. One of the girls’…

Paratroopa: Lol!

Kooper: … Did you just say “lol”?

Paratroopa: Haha, yeah!

Kooper: … Oh…kay…

Paratroopa: By the way, when do we leave?

Koops: Uhhhh… 1:30 PM.

Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Lemmy: Well, we certainly had fun on Rainbow Road!

Iggy: Yeah, I’m kinda sad to leave it behind.

Lemmy: Well, here’s the city. How do we find the bus depot?

Iggy: We could ask someone. Excuse me, sir, I-


Iggy: *facepalm* Now I know how Dad feels…

Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Snifit: Uhh, Booster… Do you have any idea where we are?

Booster: Uhh… Europa?

Snifit: No, we’re on Pilt, but where on Pilt are we?

Booster: Duuuuuhhhhh…

*Time Lapse*

Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
All 4: Byyyyeeeee!!!

Lemmy: Good luck to ya!

Snifit: Wow, are you being nice?

Lemmy: Hey, I am! What’s wrong with me?!

Second Bus to Luigi’s Mansion – Kooper & Koops, Koopa & Paratroopa (1:30 PM)

Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends
Kooper: Well! We’re off!

***Koops: *sigh* Our position isn’t bad, but it isn’t good either… I think we both really want first. We just can’t seem to reach it…

Kooper: Adventure ho!!!

First Bus to Luigi’s Mansion - Scheduled Rest Stop
Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Dixie: *yawn* Hey, we’re stopping.

Tiny: Ooh!!! IHOP!!!

Dixie: Omigod! I love IHOP!!!

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Kat: Heh heh. Come on, let’s go.

Ana: Pancakes!

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Tiny: These are good. You should try some.

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Kat: Uhh… no thanks. You can have all the chocolate pancakes you like.

Ana: Oh! I just remembered! Did you guys see the passport stamp for Rainbow Road? It’s so cool!

Dixie: Let’s see it.

Kat: Um… Oh, shoot. I left the fanny pack on the bus. I’ll go get it…

Ana: Take out your passport, I assume you got the same one.

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Dixie: Okay, I… Tiny?

Tiny (mouth full) Mmm?

Dixie: Do you have the fanny pack?

Tiny: … *gulp* No…

Dixie: You… you don’t?! ‘Cus I don’t either!

Tiny: What?! No!! We need that!!!

Ana: Don’t panic! Maybe it’s on the bus! Let’s go look!

Dixie: Oh, god I hope so…

Tiny: This… is not good…

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Kat: Hi, Ana, I got it.

Ana: That’s good. Did you see Dixie & Tiny’s on there?

Kat: Er, no, I didn’t…

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Tiny: No! Check again! Everybody! Start looking for it!

Kat: Oh, no! You didn’t lose it, did you?

Third Bus to Luigi’s Mansion – Iggy & Lemmy, Booster & Snifit (2:00 PM)
Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Lemmy: And we are off!

Iggy: Smell ya later, Mushroom City!

***Iggy: Well, we’re really displeased with our position currently, and we want to make up some serious ground.

Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Booster: Oh, mai, gawshes! A busss!

Snifit: Yes, Booster! It’s a bus, and hopefully this bus will lead us to victory!

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Dixie: Well, we’ve looked everywhere, and it is simply nowhere to be found.

Tiny sniffles.

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Kat: When do you last remember having it?

Tiny: Well… we definitely had it when we left the Pit Stop, so hopefully it’s back at the bus depot.

Ana: If you leave now, you can hopefully catch up.

Tiny: Yeah, right…

Ana: Hey! Don’t feel down! Luigi’s Mansion is a confusing place! The others are sure to mess up… a lot!

Tiny: All right…

Dixie: C’mon, Tiny. This bus goes to Mushroom City, see?

Tiny: Two tickets please…

Ana: Good luck, you two! We’ll expect to see you soon!

Tiny: Bye!!!

The bus roars off into the distance.

Ana: Speaking of busses, it looks like it’s time to head off!

Kat: Oh, all right! Let’s skidaddle!

First Bus to Luigi’s Mansion - Kat & Ana, final route

Second Bus to Luigi’s Mansion – Scheduled Pit Stop
Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners
Paratroopa: *yaaaaaaawn* Are we there yet?

Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends
Koops: No, but at the rate we’re travelling at, it will be the pitch black of midnight once we reach the haunted mansion.

Kooper: Oooooohh… Sounds interesting…

Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners
Koopa: It doesn’t matter! I ain’t afraid of no ghosts!

Koops: Well, if we meet some, who we gon’ call?

Kooper: Duh! Luigi!

Koops: Heh… yeah…

We see a fast forward of an IHOP breakfast.

Kooper: That was great! I’m refreshed and ready to go!

Koops: I agree! I feel like I can handle any ghosts.

Kooper: Really?

Koops: No… Now that I’ve said the word “ghosts”, I’m scared again.

Kooper, Koopa, and Paratroopa sigh.

Second Bus to Luigi’s Mansion - Kooper & Koops, Koopa & Paratroopa, final route

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Dixie: Gosh, I’m exhausted…

Tiny: Well… we’re here… Do you see it?

Dixie: Well, I was saying that I’d like to visit here again. This is not what I meant…

Tiny: We are so totally in last place right now. Look, all three busses are gone.

Dixie: It doesn’t matter. Just find the fanny pack.

Tiny: Here it is, over on the bench.

Dixie: *sigh* Okay… How do we proceed?

Third Bus to Luigi’s Mansion – Scheduled Pit Stop
Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master

Snifit: Er… yes… Yes we are. This is the rest stop at IHOP.

Booster: Lawl ryme!

Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Iggy: Get… me… outta… here…

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Dixie: Hi! Two tickets for the next bus to the Forbidden Forest, please!

Grumba: *grumble, grumble* Fine. Here. You leave in ten minutes.

Tiny: Er… thanks.

Dixie: Well, he was certainly grumpy…

***Tiny: We made a huge mistake, and now we’re paying for it. We really have to step up our game, hold fast, and try to stay alive.

***Dixie: Hopefully, no one’s found that Fast Forward yet…

Final Bus to Luigi’s Mansion – Dixie & Tiny (2:25 PM)

Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Booster: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaa!!!

Snifit: *sigh* It wasn’t that funny!

Booster: HA! Waaahahahaa!! Hahahaaaa!!! Goombas!! Haaa!

Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Iggy: Hey guys, time to scram.

Lemmy: Oh, my god, finally! Let’s get out of here now!!

Third Bus to Luigi’s Mansion - Booster & Snifit, Iggy & Lemmy, final route

Phil: All 6 teams are currently en route to Luigi’s Mansion and are separated by one half hour, with the exception of Dixie & Tiny, who are only 25 minutes behind the third bus. Currently, the first bus is arriving, while at the same time, the last bus has reached the refuelling stop.

First Bus to Luigi’s Mansion - Kat & Ana
Kat: We’re here!

Ana: I can’t believe it!

We see a panoramic shot of the mansion. It’s nighttime, and the ambience is spooky.

Kat: Wow… Creepy-looking…

Ana: I can’t believe Luigi went through this thing!

Kat: Mhm… Hey, there’s the clue!

Ana: I hope the girls are doing okay!

Final Bus to Luigi’s Mansion - Scheduled Pit Stop
Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Dixie: Ugh… Welcome back.

Tiny: Well… at least we didn’t wait until we got to the mansion to realize we lost the passport…

Dixie: *sigh* But we’re so far behind…

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas

Kat: Roadblock!

Phil: A Roadblock is a task that only one person may perform. No person may do more than six Roadblocks on the entire race. In this Roadblock, teams must relive the frightening perils that Luigi was forced to endure when he saved his brother… They will have to don a Poltergust 3000 and search the first floor for ten ghosts. They must then subdue them with the built-in flashlight and capture them within the Poltergust. Once they have caught ten, they will receive their next clue.

Kat: “Who can survive a haunted house?”

Ana: Uhh… I think I’d like to take it.

Kat: Are you sure?

Ana: I want to become more in tune with the darkness…

Kat: All right, Sis. Good luck!

Ana: I hope no ghosts eat me!

Kat snickers.

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Tiny: (munching) Th’s ‘s gud!

Dixie: *mumbles* Yeah…

Tiny: Hey… *gulp* Where’s the bathroom?

Dixie: Uhhh… I’m not sure. Go look for it.

Tiny: Okay! Be right back!

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Kat: *yawn* I’m tired… You sure you can heft that thing?

Ana: Ugh… Yeah. It’s a little bulky, I must admit.

Kat: Okay, you ready? Go straight through here to find the rooms you should search.

Ana: Okay! I’m off!

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Tiny: Where is this bathroom? Why do they always have to hide these things? Ugh… Let’s look over here.

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas

Kat: Ana? Did a ghost scare you already?!

Ana: No… It was a spider!

Kat: >.<

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Tiny: Uhhhh my gaaaawd! I can’t find it! *sigh* Maybe they put it around back like at gas stations…

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Ana: The Dining Room? Aha! I see you!

Gold Ghost: Gwwaaaahhh!

Ana: Take this!

She shines her flashlight.

Gold Ghost: Urk!

She begins to vacuum him up, and he is sucked in rather easily.

Ana: Yeah! I got one! Woah… that was exciting! What was Luigi complaining about? This is fun!

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Tiny: I’m gonna cry… I cannot find this thing… Hey, what’s this box? … Oh… my… gosh. This cannot be real! DIIIXXXXIIIIEEEE!!!

Dixie: Whatwhatwhat?

Tiny: Boom boom akalakalaka boom! Look what I found!

Tiny holds up a green envelope.

Dixie: No way! You found it HERE?

Tiny: Yeah! Urk! Read it, please! I still haven’t found the bathroom.

Dixie: *wry look* Kay, Sis.


Phil: In this Fast Forward, one team must find, subdue, and capture a portrait ghost. These ghosts are much more powerful and resilient than the regular ghosts. Once they catch one, the ghost will relinquish the Fast Forward award.

Dixie: All right! Let’s get going!


Tiny: Totally!

Final Bus to Luigi’s Mansion - Final route

The moon flies a quarter of the way across the sky…

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Ana: Phew! This is exhausting!

Kat: Hey, you! How many you got?
Ana: Oy! I’ve gone in a big circle, down the corridor, out the Conservatory, and back here. I got eight.

Kat: You shoulda been done by now! Are you scared?

Ana: No… It’s just tiring.

Kat: *yawn* You have a point. We haven’t slept in about 18 hours now…

A clock chimes… creepily.

Kat: Well, get a move on! Other busses are arriving!

Ana: Okay!

Second Bus to Luigi’s Mansion - Koopa & Paratroopa, Kooper & Koops
Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners
Paratroopa: Woo! The brochure wasn’t kidding! This place is creepy-looking!

Koopa: … You got a brochure for this place?

Paratroopa: Yeah! From that nice guy in the IHOP parking lot!

Koopa: Lemme see that… Para, this is a piece of paper with a badly drawn house that says “creepy-looking” on it.

Paratroopa: Yeah! It’s dead-on, too!

Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends
Both: …

Kooper: No comment. Come on, let’s go.

Koops: Uh, how about we just… not.

Kooper: How about we not not. We won’t not if we do.

Koops: Not not? But not is not a problem for me.

Kooper: Not gonna happen. We’re not notting just because your not is not not.

Koops: Wait… what?

*Riiiiiiiiiiiip* *Riiiiiiiiiiiiiip*

Kooper and Koopa: Roadblock!

Kooper: *sigh* I guess I’m doing this one.

Koops: W-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-what tipped you off?

Kooper: The fact that you’re inside your shell right now.

Koops: *echo* Hey! I feel safe in here.

Kooper facepalms.

Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners
Koopa: I’ll do it.

Paratroopa: Go for it!

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Dixie: … Did we just pass by those passengers?

Tiny: Why didn’t we stop?

Dixie: Hmm…

Kruupa: Dudes! You’re on the express bus.

Dixie: What? Express bus?

Tiny: No stops?

Kruupa: Nope

Tiny: Wow! What a break!

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Ana: Gah! C’mere, you wiener!

Purple Puncher: Hay! Just because I’m skinny doesn’t mean you can call me names! Take this! *punch*

Ana: Gaaaaah!!! Owwwww… Jerk!

P.P.: Heehehehehehee…

Ana: Uhhh… Seein’ stars…

Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners
Koopa: Okay! This should be a cinch

Ghosts: Heehehehehehheeeeheheheheee…

Koopa: Those voices are everywhere! Gaaaah!!!

Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends
Kooper: Yea-hoo! I’m comin’ to get ya!

***Koops: Kooper is wild. He’s nuts! Sometimes I just don’t know how he does it. He’s never scared, never frightened, never apprehensive… I’m totally the wrong partner for him…

Koops: G-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-go… K-K-K-K-K-K-K-K-Kooper…


Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners
Paratroopa: *snicker, snicker* He’s a fun one, eh?

Koops: *sigh* yeah…

Paratroopa: How did you two end up being friends?

Koops: Oh, I dunno, we had a lot in common…

Paratroopa: Uhhhhh… You do?!
Koops: Well, we were both Mario’s partners, we both love Kolorado, we both enjoy comedy…

Paratroopa: Yeah, but your personalities are completely opposite…

Koops: Mmmm…

Third Bus to Luigi’s Mansion
Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Both: …

Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Snifit: *yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawn*


All 4: Gaaaah!


Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Snifit: *groan* What was that?

Booster: Hay! I waz zeeeeeeing!

Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Iggy: What was it?

Lemmy: *deep groan* I know that sound. I’d recognize it anywhere.

The camera cuts to a flat tire.

Iggy: ****!

Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Snifit: Aw, no! That’s gonna put us even farther behind!

Booster: Aww, it’s okay! We’ll just use this! *burp*

Snifit: … Use what?

Booster: Huh… Usually when I do that, tires come out…

Snifit: H… no! I said when you do that you tire me out!

Booster: Eh, apples and star fruits!

Snifit: This can’t be haaapeniiiiiiiiiinnngggg!!!

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Ana: *huff* Well! I think I’m done! That… was tough…

Kat: Good job, Ana!

Ana: It was fun! A real challenge!


Ana: Search the upstairs rooms…

Phil: Teams must now make their way to the topmost floor of the mansion and search the rooms above for one of 10 hidden clues.

Kat: (quietly) Top floor, eh? Let’s go then!

Ana: Gotcha!

Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners
Paratroopa: Aww, man! They’re done! HOW YA DOIN’, KOOPA?

Koopa: I’m lost! I can’t find my way around this place!

Paratroopa: You holdin’ up?

Koopa: I’m an idiot!

Paratroopa: Hahahahahaa…

Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends
Koops: *sigh* C’mon, Kooper! Y’can do this!

Kooper: Hey! Come! Back! Here! You! Dolt!

Gold Ghost: Heeehehehehehe


Koops: I think his primal instinct has come out…

Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners
Paratroopa: Heh…

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Kat: This is the upper floor? It looks like there’s only two rooms… Let’s try this one…

Ana: Uhh… Kat! Don’t!


Kat: Ahhhhh!! Ah, dang! That hurt. It freakin’ smacked me against the wall!

Ana: Sorry! I just noticed the lack of hinges! It was a fake door!

Kat: *groan* Well, in that case, there’s only one room…

Ana: Hm… well… Let’s take a look…

Final Bus to Luigi’s Mansion
Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Dixie: Heeheeee! Looks like everything’s gonna turn out okay!

Tiny: I wonder if anyone’s checked in yet? Luigi’s Mansion is complicated.

Dixie: Eh, don’t worry. Whatever happens happens, I guess. It’s fate…

The bus roars past rather quickly.

Third Bus to Luigi’s Mansion
Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Snifit: C’mon, guys… Get it together now… Kinda in a hurry here!

Dryite: We be dun sooon! You wait! Now time for sit down.

Snifit: *grumble, grumble*

Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Iggy: Why does this always happen to us?

Lemmy: Yeah, what did we ever do to deserve this?

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Tiny: What was that? Was that a bus? Did you see that?! It was a bus! It was a bus! I saw teams! I saw teams!

Dixie: Woah, slow down, lightning! You saw a bus with teams? Where?

Tiny: It was on the side of the road! Flat tire!

Dixie: Oh my gawshes!

Tiny: I know! It’s incredible! We’re not in last! Woooo!! We’re not in laaaast!

Everyone else on the bus: …

Tiny: Wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Kat: *exhale* Okay! I’m officially sick of this dusty, dark mansion. This has to be the first dark place I haven’t been fond of.

Ana: It feels so… archaic…

Kat: Mhm… You wanna look over there?

Ana: Which room is that?

Kat: I dunno… The sign says… ”Clockwork Room”… Huh? What kind of a name is that?

Ana: Your guess is as good as- Woah! Color overload!

Kat: My goodness! This must be the most colourful room in the mansion! It’s almost… uplifting.

Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners
Koopa: Oh my god, I got another one! I’m on a roll! I guess I was doing something wrong before, and now I’m not. Man! That happens to me way too often. I’ve got nine! Just one more!

Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends
Kooper: Oh, shoot… Now I’m totally lost. Where am I?

Blue Twirler: I don’t know. I’m lost too. Will you help me out?

Kooper: Gah!!!

*Vacuum sound effects*

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Kat: Grrr… Okay, one more room to check: the Armory.

Ana: I think we’ve almost lost our minds.

Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners
Koopa: One more!

Paratroopa: All right! We’re almost done!

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Tiny: Look, look, look!

Dixie: We’re almost there.

Triple split-screen shows the aforementioned three teams completing their tasks. They all finish at the same time, and the screen flashes white!

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Dixie: Oh my gosh, we’re here!

Tiny: Come on! Let’s go! Fast Forward, here we come!

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Both: Detour!

Phil: A Detour is a choice between two tasks, each with its own pros and cons. In this Detour, teams have to choose between two ways to make the mansion sparkle: Literal Sparkle or Figurative Sparkle. In Literal Sparkle, teams will have to search the entire mansion for a pre-selected gemstone, a ruby, sapphire, emerald, or diamond. Teams may not know this, but diamonds are actually harder to find. Once the team has found their selected gem, they will receive their next clue. In Figurative Sparkle, teams will have to choose a third floor room and clean it. Once the Mr. Bones is satisfied, teams will receive their next clue as thanks… for making their room sparkle.

Ana: Sparkle, sparkle… uh… sparkle… I’m confused.

Kat: Give it here! *reads* Let’s find the gemstone. That shouldn’t be much of a hassle. We’ll go look for a ruby.

Ana: Ooh! I love gems!

Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners

Paratroopa: Good job, buddy! You did that quickly!

Koopa: Search the third floor, eh? Okay!

Paratroopa: When in doubt, go up!

Koopa: I wasn’t in doubt…

Paratroopa: Never mind…

The door bursts open.
Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Dixie: Fast Forward, baby! Here we come.

All the teams have shocked expressions.

Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends
Koops: No…

Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners
Paratroopa: …way

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Tiny: Woah!

***Paratroopa: I couldn’t believe it. We had finally caught a break, and then those girls come bursting in with the Fast Forward.

***Koops: We’re sick and tired of those two coming in the top three so often.

***Koopa: I mean, once we saw the ninjas here but no monkeys, we thought they were out for sure. Now, they’re just going to beat us again.

Tiny: It’s a Mario Party! Come on! Let’s jet!

Dixie: Bye!!!

Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends
Koops: UUuuuuuggghhhhhh… *bleep*

Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners
Koopa: Where was the Fast Forward? Did you see it?

Paratroopa: Who cares?! If we hurry we can still beat them!

Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Iggy: Oh, what music to my ears!

Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Snifit: It’s working?! Spectacular! Let’s get going, already! Booster! Stop eating that tree, and let’s go!

Booster: Kay!!! *ptooie*

Snifit: Onward!

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Dixie: Is this the room?
Tiny: I believe so… Where’s the ghost?

Dixie: He’s hiding. You got your Poltergust?

Tiny: Locked and loaded.

Dixie: All right! Come on out, you coward! Hurry up and shout boo at us!

Tiny: Hey, that’s stereotypical. Not all ghosts have to shout boo; it’s not a rule.

Uncle Grimmly: BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Both: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!

Lightning strikes outside…

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Ana: *sigh* This should be a breeze! It’s nice and dark, so the gems’ sparkle will stand out!

Kat: Actually, iridescent gems only expel light that is refracted through it from outside sources like daylight…

Ana: … Shaddup…

Kat winks.

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Dixie: Okay, fool! Take this!

She Shines the flashlight.

Grimmly: Ack! Light! My one weakness!

Tiny: Uhhh… What do you do during the daytime, then?

Dixie: Yeah! Come to think of it, have you ever seen this place during the daytime?

Tiny: No… no I haven’t

Dixie: Do you think it’s ever day around here?

Tiny: Well, stranger things exist in this world. Who knows?


Dixie: ! Geeze! Stop doing that! You are the textbook example of a ghost, y’know that?

Tiny: Shut up and catch him!

Dixie: You got it, Sis!

Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends
Koops: Ohhh… what a mess… I’ll bet you anything he’s completely lost in there.

Koops: Hmm… I wonder what happened to the Koopa Kids? And Booster? They were on the third bus, and, from what I understand, the monkeys were after that… Hmmm…

Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Iggy: C’mon, c’mon, c’mon! Faster!

Lemmy: Woooooo!!! We can totally catch up!

Iggy: Yeaaaaahhh!!! No negativity!

Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners
Koopa: Iiiiiiiiiiiii… hate this place!!!

Paratroopa: Me too. C’mon, let’s get off this balcony before we get struck by lightning… like-

Koopa: Like Luigi!

Paratroopa: Aww, you beat me to it! Haha!

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Kat: Is that one? Over there, behind that pot?

Ana: … Nope, it’s an emerald.

Kat: Aw! Well, I doubt they’d put more that one gem in a room, so let’s go over there. What’s this room? A bathroom? Huh…

Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners
Paratroopa: Wa-haaa! It’s a Detour!

Koopa: Nnnot that exciting, my friend! Hm… Hey! Let’s go clean the room! You can use your wings to fan away the dust!

Paratroopa: Awww! I just got them cleaned!

Koopa: *sigh* Come on, let’s go.

Paratroopa: Okay… *mutters* Raspberries…

There is silence as the camera moves down a hallway.

Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends
Koops: *sigh* This is ridiculous! I hope a ghost didn’t eat him…

Kooper: Where… am… I…? I am completely lost and confused! *sigh* Well, the good news is I have nine ghosts. So I only need one more…

Speedy Spirit: Raaaaaaahhh!!!

Kooper: Gah!!! Hey! You! I! Vacuum!

The Speedy Spirit zoooooooooooooooooms off.

Kooper: Hey! Wait! Come back!!!

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters

Dixie: Yeah yeah, boo! Whatever! Hiyah!

She shines the flashlight.

Grimmly: Gah! Oh well! I always escape in the split second it takes for you to switch from flashlight to vacuum!

Tiny: Then try this!

Grimmly: Huh?!

Tiny, standing behind him, activates her Poltergust and latches onto Grimmly.

Grimmly: Gaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!!!

Tiny: Woah!!! *falls to her stomach* Dixie! Help me out!

Dixie: I gotcha!

She runs over and holds the nozzle of the Poltergust.

Tiny: Yeah! You’re going down now!!!

Grimmly: Nooooooooooooooooooooooo!!! I’ll never surrender!!!

Dixie: Pfff! That is so cliché!

Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends
Kooper: Wait! Come back! Where are you going! I won’t hurt you! I only want to suck you into this vacuum!


Kooper: That came out wrong!!! Waaaaait!!!

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Kat: Aha! Victory!

Ana: You found one?

Kat: Got it right here! One ruby!

Ana: Wow! Pretty!

Kat: And now we get our clue. Here we are! *Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiip* Make your way to the Pit Stop…

Phil: Teams must now find their way here… the rooftop. This expansive, flat-topped area is perfect for stargazing, and even epic battles! And it’s the Pit Stop for this leg of the race! The last team to check in here… may be eliminated!

Kat: Rooftop? How do we get there? I didn’t see any more stairs…

Ana: Hmmm…

*Screech* *Fufufufu… fu… fu… psssshhhhh*
Third Bus to Luigi’s Mansion - Iggy/Lemmy, Booster/Snifit
Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Iggy: Well… we finally made it.

Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Snifit: C’mon! Let’s go catch up!

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
*Vacuum sounds*

Tiny: And with that…

Dixie: …we… gotcha!!!

Grimmly: Noooooooo!

*pop* An envelope flutters out from where he was.

Dixie: Aha!


Dixie: Congratulations! Go directly to the next Pit Stop! The Rooftop!

Tiny: Ooooh! I know how to get there!

Dixie: You do? Awesome! Let’s go!

Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends
Kooper: Please come back! I- Hey! It’s the Foyer!

Koops: Kooper! What- who? Huh?

Kooper: Oh, right! Come on!!!

Speedy Spirit: Gah!!!

Kooper: C’mere!!!


Koops: Is that it? Are you done?

Kooper: Yeah, and thank god he led me back here! I was so lost!

Koops: Yeah, whatever!


Kooper: Oh boy, another searching task… Okay, let’s go then.

Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners
Koopa: Yeah! Very good! Keep at it!

Paratroopa is fanning his wings very quickly

The camera shifts out a window, then rises to the roof. Phil is standing at the mat with E. Gadd.

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Ana: Come on, Sis! Let’s get this one number one!

Kat: Okay! Only problem is, WE CAN’T FIND A STAIRCASE!

Ana: Maybe we’re overthinking this. Let’s try this room…

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Dixie: Oh boy, am I glad we found that Fast Forward!

Tiny: It was our blessing!

Phil raises an eyebrow.

???: Up there?

???: Yep! There’s a draft coming down! Let’s go!

An elevator is heard whirring,

Kat/Ana -- Sisters / Ninjas
Kat: Wahoo!

Ana: Boy, what fun!

Kat: Well hello there, friend!

E. Gadd: Welcome… to Luigi’s Mansion. Glad you made it out… alive…

Phil: Heh heh… Kat & Ana?

Kat: These anticipations you give us are killing me! Just tell us.

Phil: You’re… team number one!

Kat: Wheeee!!! That’s crazy!

Ana: I like it! I like it a lot!

Phil: As the winners of this leg of the race… you have won an all-expense paid trip to Isle Cancara!

Both: Woww!!! Amazing!

Phil: This beautiful, crab-shaped island off the coast of Isle Delfino contains sun-soaked splendor, many tropical resorts, and more beaches than you can shake a stick at.

Ana: Excellent.

Kat: By this time, we really need a vacation.

(Riiiiiiiiiip) (Riiiiiiiiiiiiiip)
Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Iggy: Roadblock…

Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Snifit: Roadblock. I will do it. I don’t care, I’m doing it.

Booster: Uhhh… No argument from MWWWWAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Snifit: Exactly.

Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Lemmy: Me…

Dixie/Tiny -- Sisters
Dixie: Hi, Phil!

Tiny: Phil! We made it!

Phil: Dixie & Tiny? You’re… team number 2!

Tiny: Yes! That’s an awesome comeback. Just the kind we needed!

Phil: So, the Fast Forward was helpful, then?

Dixie: Yes, definitely! You ask the world to supply you with lemons, and we got ours just when we needed them! Now we have delicious lemonade!

Tiny: Hahahahahaa!

Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Iggy: C’mon, Lemmy! You can do it!

Lemmy: I’m doin’ it, Bro!

Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Booster: Kawmon, Lemmy! U can do it!

Snifit: Hey! Cheer for me, ya big lummox!

Booster: You’re not Lemmy? GAAAAHHH! My entire life is a lie!!!

Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends
Both: Detour!

Koops: Can we just take the sure road and clean the room?

Kooper: Why?

Koops: I’ve had enough of this whacked-out mansion, and I don’t want to go poking around through it any longer.

Kooper: A’ight… Let’s go… Hey! There’s the other Koopas!

Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners
Koopa: Yo, Para! One more fanning over here and we’ll be done!

Paratroopa: *flapflapflap* Ugh, finally! That only took forever!

Koopa: Well, good! We’re done now!


Koopa: Pit Stop! Off we go!

Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends
Kooper: They’re done already? Aw, man! Let’s hurry!

Koops: Yeah, the sooner this leg is over, the better!

Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners
Koopa: Where’s the roof? Where? How?

Paratroopa: Can I just fly up there?

Koopa: Can you carry me up? We gotta find a staircase or somethin’

Paratroopa: Gosh, this room is colourful.

Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends
Kooper: Koops! Get those goblets, please! I’ve got all these odd jars!

Jarvis: Dunt touch mah jars!!!

Kooper: Wah! Hey, butt, out buddy! We’re trying to run a race here!

Koopa/Paratroopa -- Partners
Paratroopa: Aha! Look! This pink… thing is really an elevator! See ya! Wheee!

Koopa: Hey, wait up!


Koopa: Haha, you lunatic!

Phil: Koopa & Paratroopa… you’re team number 3!

Koopa: Wow! That’s not half bad!

Paratroopa: Excellent! Another leg completed!

Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Lemmy: Hahaa! Yeah! Take that! And this! I am on a roll! There’s ghosts everywhere, and I’m getting them all! I’m almost done!

Gold Ghost: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!! *pop*

Lemmy: Yeah! That’s number nine!!!

Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends
Kooper: Are we done?

Mr. Bones shakes his head no.

Kooper: What are we missing?

Koops: … What about… I don’t know…

Kooper: Hmmmm…

Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Snifit: Ugghhh… Come on…

Blue Twirler: HA! *Bam*

Snifit: Waaaahhh! No! I lost another one… This is so hard! I’m just too small… Booster should’ve done this… although I doubt he’d do much better… *sigh*

Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends
Kooper: Ugh, THERE! You happy now?

Koops: Why? What did we miss?

Kooper: The pedestals holding the freaking pots…

Koops: Oh well. Thank you, Mr!


Koops: Oh, good! Let’s go to the Pit Stop. Do you know how to get to the roof?

Kooper: As a matter of fact, I do!

Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Lemmy: Yeaaah! I’m done!

Iggy: What, already? Dang, Bro! That was fast!

Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Booster: Duuu-wwwwwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh?!

Iggy: Please get me out of here! Now!


Iggy: All right, let’s skiddadle!

Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Booster: Leeeemmyyy!!! ... I mean, Sniiiiiffiiiiittttt!!! Whar you be?!

Snifit (distant) Gah!!! Gotcha! I’VE GOT FIVE!!!

Booster: Oy! Dat’s two more than ten!

Snifit (distant): No it’s not!

Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Lemmy: Okay, now to find a clue!

Iggy: You mean like this?

Lemmy: Wh-where did you find that?

Iggy: Right here in the tiger’s mouth!

Lemmy: … How in the world did no one else find that?!


Lemmy: Detour!

Kooper/Koops -- Recent Friends
Koops: And we’re here! Finally!

Phil: Kooper & Koops?

Koops: Please hurry!

Phil: *chuckle* You’re team number 4!

Kooper: All right… good enough…

Koops: I don’t care! CAN WE LEAVE NOW?!

Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Snifit: Ugh… Okay, Booster! I’m done. Let’s get going.

Booster: Hm? The letter “K”!

Snifit: Uh, did Lemmy & Iggy leave already?

Booster: I thought you were Lemmy!


Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Iggy: Heh! You know, cleaning isn’t actually such a bad chore.

Lemmy: Yeah, I mean, it’s certainly faster that looking for something. Remember the 1-Up Mushrooms?

Iggy: Ugh, yeah. S’okay though, we’ll be done with this in no time!

Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Snifit: Booster, do you see a clue? Ugh, which room are we in? I get so lost in this maze!

Booster: Wur in the paintz studio!

Snifit: Oh, yeah… Hm… Let’s check around. There should be one here.

Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Lemmy: Good job, Ig! This phone room is so dusty!

Iggy: *Achoo!!!* You’re telling me!

Lemmy: Just get those chests, and don’t forget to do the insides too!

Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Snifit: Aha! I got one! It was behind one of the canvases!


Booster: S’a DAY-tour!

Snifit: Hmmmm… Okay Booster, we need to go find a shiny blue rock. You hear me? Shiny BLUE rock!

Booster: Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii’m on it!!!


Snifit: Wait for me!!!

Intense music plays…

Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Iggy: Almost done!

Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Snifit: Where are we going?

Lemmy: Get that vase!

Snifit: Is it over here?

Iggy: Okay…

Snifit: Are you sure! Right in this vase?

Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers
Lemmy: Done!!!

Mr. Bones: Veeeeery gooooood!!!

Iggy: Thanks, now gimme!


Iggy: Pit Stop, let’s hurry!

Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
*record scratch*

Snifit: Booster! This isn’t a shiny blue rock!

Booster: Oooohooooohhh!!! I thought you said slimy blue sock!

Snifit: Ewww… I hate you so much right now…

Iggy/Lemmy -- Brothers

Iggy: So, this is the elevator?

Lemmy: Yep! Here we go!

*Elevator noises*

Iggy: Phil!

Phil: Iggy & Lemmy?

Both: …

Phil: You’re… team number 5!

Iggy: All right! That’s just fine with me!

Lemmy: Onward!

Booster/Snifit -- Lackey + Master
Snifit: Gaaahh! Booster! Slow down! Are you sure you see a shiny blue rock this time?

Booster: Yesh! Cross my die and hope to heart!

Snifit: Ugh... I just hope so…

Snifit: It’s pretty. Can we keep it?


Booster: Mayk ur wai 2 the nex stop of Pit!

Snifit: Whatever…

Phil: Snifit & Booster? … You’re the last team to arrive…

Snifit: I knew it would happen eventually…

Phil: …

Phil: The good news is, this is a non-elimination leg!

Snifit: Huh? What? WHAT?!

Booster: Yay?

Snifit: Yes, “Yay”!!! We’re still in the race!!! WAAAAAAAAAHOOOOOO!!!

Phil: Congratulations, you two.

Snifit: I don’t believe it!

Phil: That’s the good news. You two are now marked for elimination. This means that during the next leg, if you do not arrive in first place, you will incur a 30-minute penalty.

Snifit: That’s okay! We’ll find a way to survive!

Booster: Ay’m still confuzzled. What?

Snifit: It’s all right, Booster. We’ll just do what we always do and find a way to stay in the race, even if we have to give 1,000 percent.

***Snifit: It was great fortune that we were able to stay in the race. We just had too much bad luck in this leg, and I feel that we can easily come in first place on the next leg. No question!

***Booster: Bye bye, everyone!!!

***Snifit: Heh heh… For now, that is…

The credits roll…

Read on!

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