Paper Larry: Fall of the Witch

By Larry

Prologue: The Awakening and The Mission!

Larry and Iggy are still asleep in the black void. They suddenly wake up.

Larry: *yawns* That was a good nap…

Iggy: I guess that G-Man guy wants us…

The G-Man appears before the Koopalings.

The G-Man: Rise and shine, little Koopasss, rissse and shine. Not that I wish to imply you’ve been sssleeping on the job. Your hour hasss come again. Princess Peach is throwing a party at her castle and you two mussst go and stay there until noon. You’ll know when your assssignment hasss ssstarted.

The G-Man vanishes and suddenly the two Koopalings are in front of Peach’s castle.

Larry: I don’t think I’m gonna like working for that guy, he’s so bossy!

Iggy: We have no choice…

Toad Guard: Hey, who are y-

Larry punches the guard in the face, knocking him out.

Larry: Well, we might as well go in. What time is it?

Iggy: *checks his watch that appeared from nowhere* We only have ten minutes until noon! Let’s get going!

The watch vanishes as the two enter the castle.

Toad: Hello, welcome to the party!

Iggy: Go away.

Iggy pushes the Toad away as the two Koopas go through the castle. The other party guests seem to barely notice them.

Larry: Why don’t people see us as a threat anymore?

Iggy: At least they aren’t attacking us.

Larry: True…

The two go upstairs and see Princess Peach.

Peach: Hey, it’s those two nice gentlemen who saved me!

Larry: … Right…

Suddenly, there’s ringing in the air.

Peach: It must be noon!

The ground starts shaking.

Iggy: What’s going on?!

Larry: Probably what The G-Man was talking about!

The ground beneath the castle opens up, and the castle is lifted by a giant metal Koopa Clown Copter. On it is a large, stone structure with Bowletta’s face on it, and on top of that is a large castle with Peach’s Castle on top.

Peach: What’s going on? I see stars outside!

Larry: What’s that outside of the window?

A large object is flying towards the window, and breaks through! It’s Bowletta in a Koopa Clown Copter, followed by a Magikoopa in a black robe and hat. Princess Peach backs off a bit.

Kameo: Infiltration complete, Bowletta!

Bowletta: Eyahahaha! Very good!

Bowletta notices Larry and Iggy. Her jaw drops.

Bowletta: What… But… WHY ARE YOU TWO HERE?! It must have been that meddling G-Man!

Larry: How are you here?!

Bowletta: My master had a hand in that. It doesn’t matter! I will destroy you both!

Larry: Yeah, because you’ve done such a great job so far!

Bowletta: Grrr…

Bowletta jumps from her vehicle and stands before her enemies.

Bowletta: Time to-

Larry quickly dashes at Bowletta and elbows her in the gut, stunning her momentarily.

Bowletta: Gyah!

Iggy follows up with an uppercut that makes Bowletta arc in the air for a second before slamming into the floor.

Bowletta: Die!

She gets up and breathes fire at the two, but they dodge easily.

Larry: This is pathetic!

Iggy: Are you even trying?

Bowletta: Fine, you want me to try! SO BE IT!

Bowletta takes out an object from her shell.

Bowletta: With the Star Rod, you cannot win!

Bowletta waves the rod and glows rainbow colors.

Larry: Nice special effects, but they won’t help!

Larry punches Bowletta in the face with no effect.

Bowletta: Eyahaha!

Iggy: Let me try!

Iggy shoots several green fireballs at Bowletta, which also do nothing.

Bowletta: Fools! I am invincible!

Bowletta shoots a purple flame at the two Koopas and the fire engulfs them and knocks them out.

Bowletta: Eyahaha! I love this thing! So long, you pests!!!

Bowletta waves the rod again and a bolt of lightning strikes the Koopas. They are sent flying in different directions out the window.

Bowletta: Excellent. Guards! Take the princess to her chamber…

Chapter 1: We will settle things.

Larry falls out the window a very, very, VERY long way, and lands in a forest. Somehow, he survives.

Larry: …

Suddenly flickering holograms of seven stars appear.

Eldstar: Ah, here he is!

Mamar: Are you sure we can trust him? He has much evil within him.

Klevar: We have no choice.

Skolar: What about Mario?

Eldstar: No time for explaining! Heal him!

The holograms fly around Larry and he glows, and is healed. He stays unconscious, however, and the holograms vanish. A few moments later, a little Goomba girl comes across Larry.

Goombaria: What the? MOOM! I FOUND SOMETHING!


???: Larry… Larry…

Larry: Five more minutes…

???: WAKE UP!

Larry: Gah!

Larry falls out of the bed he was lying in. He looks around and notices he’s in a house.

Larry: Where am I?

???: You are in Goomba Village.

Larry looks and sees a hologram of Eldstar.

Eldstar: I’m glad you managed to recover.

Larry: That’s right! Bowletta’s back! I have to go stop her!

Eldstar: Not so fast, you cannot defeat her while she has the Star Rod!

Larry: Then what do I do?

Eldstar: I can’t…ke…ep…talking…come…to…Shoo…ting St…ar…Summit…

Eldstar’s hologram vanishes.

Larry: Wait! What about Iggy? Ehh. I’m sure he’s fine.

Larry exits goes out the door into Goomba Village.

???: Hey! You!

A Goomba in a blue baseball cap runs up to Larry.

Goombario: Hi!

Larry: Shoo.

Goombario: Can I join your quest?

Larry: First, how did you know I was on a quest? Second, did you hear me?! Shoo!

Goombario: Aww… Okay…

Larry: Good.

Larry walks towards the gate on the east side of the village but Kameo appears!

Kameo: Hello, Larry! It seems you survived somehow! Bowletta will be most displeased…

Larry: Why are you working for her, Kameo?

Kameo: Because I will no longer be the third most powerful Magikoopa! Mwahahahaha!

Larry: Lame.

Kameo: Shut up!

Kameo makes a block appear and crush the gate.

Kameo: Mwahahaha! Later, loser!

He flies away.

Larry: Lamer…

Goompapa: I just fixed that gate! Grrr…Go see Goompa to get a hammer to smash that thing! Also, nobody say “gate” to me.

Larry: Gate. Gate. Gate.

Goompapa: AAGGGGHHHH!!!

He explodes.

Larry: What is this, I don’t even…

Goombario walks up to Larry, failing to notice his dad blew up.

Goombario: That block looks pesky. I bet Goompa could help you!

Larry: I could probably just climb over it…

Goombario: Just go see Goompa before I kill you.

Larry: Um. Right… Where is he?

Goombario nods at a house.

Goombario: In there.

Larry: Right, let’s get this over with.

Larry enters the house and goes through the back door into thin air.

Larry: Ah crud…

Larry falls very, very far down and lands next to an old Goomba.

Goompa: Deary me! You took quite a nasty fall!

Larry: So much pain…

Goompa: Since you’re here, can you escort me back to the village?

Larry: *sigh* Might as well.

Goompa: Good! I’m just worried about a ruffian who stalks this area.

Some nearby bushes shake.

Goompa: That must be him!

Out of the bushes jumps a yellow figure. The being is revealed to be… Shy Ranger!

Shy Ranger: There you are!

Larry: What are you-

Shy Ranger: Shut up! You’ve been going on adventures without me, and I’m tired of it!

Larry: But-

Shy Ranger: You’ll take me on this adventure, or I WILL destroy you!

Larry: …

Goompa: …

Larry: … Fine.

Shy Ranger: Yay!


Larry and Shy Ranger: Shut up!

Fine… Jerks.

Goompa: Who is this young chap?

Larry: A companion of mine.

Shy Ranger: At least I was before you stopped-

???: Hey! What are you weaklings doing here?

A figure appears and is revealed to be a baby Koopa.

Jr. Troopa: Go away! This is my turf!

Goompa: Ahh! It’s that ruffian!

Larry and Shy Ranger: … *look at each other and then burst out laughing*

Jr. Troopa: Hey, stop laughing!

Larry: Pfffftt… This is the guy you’re scared of?

Goompa: Yes! He’s terrifying!

Jr. Troopa: You’d better believe it! Here I come!

Jr. Troopa charges at Larry, who whacks him aside with his nose hairs.

Jr. Troopa: GUBA!

Shy Ranger: I wanna fight him!

Larry: He’s not even a challenge…

Shy Ranger: I don’t care! I haven’t fought in a while!

Shy Ranger charges at the recovered Jr. Troopa and kicks him into a tree.

Larry: That was cruel.

Shy Ranger: Meh.

Jr. Troopa: Grrr… I’ll get back at you two! You mark my words!

Jr. Troopa runs away.

Larry: I have a terrible feeling what he said is true.

Goompa: Thanks for saving me!

Larry: Whatever, can we just go now?

Larry, Shy Ranger, and Goompa go back to Goomba Village.

Larry: That’s it? Nothing else on the way there?

Nope, just Goombas. Boring, bland Goombas.

Goompa: Hey!

Shut up. Anyway, Goompa goes back home while Larry and Shy Ranger walk up to the block.

Larry: So, should we just climb over it?

Shy Ranger: That would probably be best.

The two easily climb over the block.

Larry: I hate RPG physics. Oh no, a block we can easily walk around or climb over! Whatever shall we do?

Shy Ranger: Are you done?

Larry: Yeah.

Goombario: Hey! How’d you get over that block?

Larry and Shy Ranger: …

Larry shoots fireballs at Goomba Village and lights it on fire.

Goombario: IT BURNS!

All the Goombas are trapped because of the block, and the fire is blocking the other gate.

Larry: I feel better now.

Shy Ranger: That was cruel.

Larry: Meh.

The two venture onward to Goomba Road.

Goomba: Halt!

Paragoomba: We will vanquish you!

Larry: Shut up.

Larry stomps on the Goomba while Shy Ranger punches Paragoomba into the distance.

Larry: I have a feeling this road will be very dull.

The two suddenly come across Red Goomba and Blue Goomba.

Red Goomba: HALT!


Larry: So dull…

Shy Ranger: … Who are you two?

Red: We work for the Goomba King!

Blue: This is his territory, you have to beat us to proceed!

Larry punches Red in the face where his nose would be.

Red: OW! Jeez…*winces* That… ow…*winces*

Larry: …

Blue: Die!

Blue headbonks Shy Ranger, who retaliates by also punching Red where his nose would be.

Red: Ow! Why did you punch me?! Blue attacked you!

Shy Ranger punches Red again.

Red: Stop it!

Larry wraps nose hairs around Blue and slams him into Red.

Both: Guba!

Blue headbonks Larry while Red headbonks Shy Ranger. The two Goombas then kick the duo to the ground.

Larry: Getting beaten by Goombas, this is embarrassing.

Shy Ranger: I have an idea…

Shy Ranger reaches into his pocket and throws sand in the Goombas’ eyes.

Shy Ranger: Pocket sand!

Red and Blue: Agh!

Larry punches the two Goombas onto a nearby spring and they are sprung onto a cliff.

Red: Retreat!

The Goombas run away. LARRY AND SHY RANGER GAIN 68 EXP!!!

Larry and Shy Ranger: …

Forget it. Anyway, the two jump on the spring and pursue the Goombas and reach a castle.

Red: Goomba King! These two people beat us up!

Blue: Beat them up for us!

Goomba King appears and jumps from his castle.


Larry: Stop yelling!

Goomba King: Sorry…

Shy Ranger jumps in the air and kicks Goomba King in the face.

Goomba King: Nobody does that to me! I will destroy you!

Goomba King kicks Shy Ranger into a tree.

Shy Ranger: Ow…

Larry notices a Goomnut Tree with a bandage on it. Larry hits it and a Goomnut falls on Goomba King’s head. The Goomnut then bounces onto Red and Blue, knocking them out.

Goomba King: My minions! I’ll destroy you!

Goomba King charges at Larry and jumps on him, doing serious damage.

Larry: GAAAHH!!

Larry whips Goomba King with his nose hairs, knocking him away.

Goomba King: You will not win!

Larry: You’re just a large Goomba, what chance do you have of winning?

Goomba King: Sh…Shut up…

Larry kicks Goomba King in the face. Shy Ranger helps out by shooting a laser from a small device on his wrist, burning off half of Goomba King’s moustache.

Goomba King: My… beautiful moustache… GRAAAAA!!!

Goomba King charges at Shy Ranger and jumps on him, burying half of Shy Ranger’s body into the ground.

Shy Ranger: *dazed* No Mommy… my pizza broke your vase…

Goomba King repeatedly kicks Shy Ranger in the face as he  is too wedged into the ground to move. Larry punches Goomba King on the back of the head, knocking the giant over and giving Shy Ranger enough time to wiggle out of the ground. Shy Ranger then kicks Goomba King and he smacks into his castle.

Goomba King: You’re too strong! I’m out of here!

Goomba King goes into his castle and locks the door. He looks out one of the windows.

Goomba King: Also, if you see a button out there, don’t press it!

Larry notices a red button with several neon signs pointing to it. He presses it. Sirens go off.

Goomba King: Why did you do that?!

Larry: Boredom.

Goomba King: Understandable.

The castle starts rumbling while Larry and Shy Ranger duck for cover in some bushes. The castle then explodes, sending Goomba King (and the knocked out Red and Blue) flying into the distance.

Shy Ranger: Why would he have a button for that?

Larry: Plot device.

Shy Ranger: Ah.

The two go through the remains of the castle and see a chasm.

Larry: Crud. Now what?

Shy Ranger: Can’t you use your random powers and get us across?

Larry: Good point!

Larry eats a tuna and the two are suddenly teleported to the other side of the pit.

Shy Ranger: … You’re so weird…

Larry: Shut up.

The two start walking, not noticing Kameo is watching them.

Kameo: I have to report to Bowletta, right away!

Kameo flies up to Bowletta’s Fortress and goes in through a window to Bowletta’s throne room.

Kameo: Bowletta, Larry and a Shy Ranger beat Goomba King!

Bowletta: Ah.

Kameo: You seem calm.

Bowletta: Goomba King was a weakling, it’s no big loss.

Kameo: I see…

Bowletta: All right, send them in!

A door opens and four Koopas come in the room wearing bandanas.

Red: We are the Koopa Bros!

Green: We are at your service, Bowletta!

Black: We will vanquish all foes!

Yellow: We like chocolate!

Red, Black, and Green glare at Yellow.

Yellow: … What?

Kameo: These guys don’t seem capable…

Bowletta: Bowser’s minions are the only minions Master will allow me to use.

Kameo: I see…

Bowletta: Say… If you guys are here… who’s guarding your fortress?

Red, Green, Black, and Yellow: Umm….

Bowletta: YOU IDIOTS!! GO, NOW!!!

Red, Green, Black, and Yellow all run out of the castle as fast as they can.

Meanwhile, Larry and Shy Ranger arrive in Toad Town.

Toad: Hello! Welcome to Toad Town!


Toad: … Huh?

Larry: Never mind. Do you know where Shooting Star Summit is?

Toad: Past where Peach’s Castle was!

Shy Ranger: You don’t seem all that worried.

Toad: When something like this happens every week or so, ya stop caring.

Larry and Shy Ranger: …

The two walk to where the castle was and go past it. Small stars start raining down from the heavens.

Larry: Should we be concerned a star may hit-

A star hits Larry on the head.

Larry: Ow! Never mind…

Shy Ranger: *chuckles* Let’s get going!

The two go up the mountain, occasionally dodging falling stars. Eventually they make it to the summit, where a hologram of Eldstar is waiting. As the duo approaches, holograms of the other Star Spirits appear.

Eldstar: Hello Larry, we’ve been expecting you.

Shy Ranger: What am I, chopped liver? I’m here too!

Eldstar: … Hello Shy Ranger.

Shy Ranger: Hi.

Eldstar: Anyway-

Klevar: Enough! We need your help, young Koopa!

Larry: Why should I help you?

Eldstar: You’ll never defeat Bowletta without our help.

Larry: What’s going on, anyway? Why are you holograms?

Eldstar: We were in Star Haven when Bowletta and Kameo came and stole the Star Rod! With it, she can do anything. Only the seven of us together can stop the Star Rod’s power.

Misstar: Bowletta scattered us around and trapped us in cards. Our powers are weak, this alone is draining so much strength…

Skolar: Our cards are being guarded by Bowletta’s minions. The closest one is in Koopa Bros. Fortress, east of Toad Town… Hurry… Please…

One by one the holograms go out, Eldstar being the last one still remaining.

Eldstar: You… m...u…s…t… hu…rr…y…

His hologram vanishes as well.

Larry: Well, you up for this kind of adventure?

Shy Ranger: You know it! Let’s get it on! *pauses, as if he hears something* Get down!

Larry and Shy Ranger duck as a knife with a note attached flies from nowhere and digs itself into the ground, barely missing Larry’s head.

Larry: Geez! What in the world was that?!

Larry picks up the note and starts reading.

Well, it seems you survived my attack. I had a feeling you would. I’ve been following you for a long time, I’ve seen the things you’ve done. I’m hoping Bowletta and the Knights will take you down. If they can’t… We will settle things.

Larry: Very odd… Nobody signed it…

Shy Ranger looks in the direction the knife came from, but sees no one.

Shy Ranger: We should get moving.

The two start going back to Toad Town.

Larry: I wonder who wrote that… I guess we’ll just have to see.

End of chapter! Who is this mysterious stranger? Why does he or she want Larry dead? Why don’t I have any more questions?! Find out the answer to none of these questions in Chapter 2: Storming the Fortress!

Read on!

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