|
Gourmet Guy: He has a knife, but... it doesn't look very sharp... |
Wart: Not many can fight Bowser and say they just barely lost. Can Wart snatch victory from defeat? |
|
Piranha Plant: Those teeth are pretty pointy, but who would be stupid enough to get that close? |
Goomba: Hm... I don't know what chance this guy thinks he has. Fan support, I guess. |
The announcer:
The referee:
***
Kamek: Welcome, again, welcome! To Roy's Sports Hall, of course! Here we are today for yet another three fighter free-for-all!
Roy: And with our top of the line Sports Hall, no less!
Pokey: Hi.
Kamek: Oh yes, and we have Pokey here. Do you think we'll have a surprise this time, Pokey?
Pokey: Dunno.
Kamek: Love the one word answers.
Pokey: Good.
Kamek: Just... shut up. Anyway, let me introduce the fighters for today! In the Red Corner, it's the fatty boy, Gourmet Guy! Lay off the sweets, will you?
Gourmet Guy: I'm not fat... uh... food.
Kamek: In the Yellow Corner, it's the immobile, and probably retarded, Piranha Plant!
Piranha Plant: Chomp chomp! Retarded?! Take that back! Go Flower Power!
Kamek: And in the Blue Corner, it's Goomba. And his name is enough of an insult.
Goomba: RESPECT!!!
Roy: Your introductions are a bit... harsher than usual. GREAT JOB MAN!
Kamek: Um... yeah. Oh, here's Larry!
Larry: PIRANHA PLANT!!! GO PLANTS!!!
Roy: Geez man, quiet down if you don't want me to sock you!
Larry: Eep.
Roy: On second thought...
SOCK!!!
Larry: AAAGH!!! Whimper.
Roy: Hahaha! I needed that. Anyway, start the fight, will you Pokester.
Pokey: Fight.
Piranha Plant: I wish I could move to attack them.
Gourmet Guy: Foooood.
Goomba: Time to gain some RESPECT!!! Hiiyyaaa!
Boing!
Kamek: Goomba attacked Gourmet Guy headfirst, only to be repelled by Gourmet Guy's fat lard.
Goomba: That's it! Time for... THROW OF RESPECT!!!
Kamek: Does it always have to be respect?
You'll never get any- OH! Goomba is lifting Gourmet Guy with his
psychic powers! And has lobbed him
at Piranha Plant!
Piranha Plant: Whoa!
WHAM!
Kamek: But Piranha Plant has retreated to the safety of its pipe and Gourmet Guy has fallen harmlessly on the pipe!
Gourmet: Um... food?
CHOMP!
Gourmet Guy: AAHHH! MY BUTT!
Kamek: Piranha Plant has apparently bit him!
Gourmet Guy: GRAAA!!!
Goomba: Oh wait! Don't come here! Not here! AAHH!!!
Kamek: Gourmet Guy is chasing after Goomba!
Goomba: AAAHHH!!! Yoink!
Kamek: Goomba has taken refuge inside the pipe! Bad move!
Piranha Plant: What the... HEY! GET OUT!
Gourmet Guy: Hello?
Kamek: Gourmet Guy is sticking his fork inside the pipe!
Goomba: YEOUCH! CUT THAT OUT!
Piranha Plant: CHOMP!
Goomba: YEOOUCH!!! Hey! I'm stuck here! Somebody help me here! Psychic... BLAST!
SHooooMBOOM!!!
Gourmet Guy: GIAAAHH!!!
WHAM!!!
Kamek: Goomba has released a psychic blast and has made Gourmet Guy hit the wall!
Roy: Whoa! Those walls are resistant!
Gourmet Guy: GRRR!!! FOOOD!!!
WHAM!!!
Kamek: Gourmet Guy has crashed against the pipe!
Gourmet: GRRRAAAGH!
Kamek: Gourmet Guy is trying to uproot the pipe!
Piranha Plant: Get out! I can't breath! CHOMPCHOMPCHOMP!
Goomba: OOWWW! STOP IT! I CAN'T GET OUT!
Gourmet Guy: RARARARR!!
Piranha Plant: WHAT THE?! Don't uproot the pipe!
Gourmet Guy: I see you... food!
Piranha Plant: Piranha THRUST!
FWAAM!
Goomba: WHOA!
Kamek: Piranha Plant has managed to make Goomba come out!
Goomba: Oh man... Too much... chompiness.
Gourmet Guy: GRRRR!!!
Goomba: OH NO! THINK THINK! Oh, I know! Psychic Cake!
Vwoom!
Kamek: Suddenly, a huge cake has appeared!
Gourmet Guy: CAAAAKKEE!!!
Kamek: The cake is running around the battlefield!
Gourmet Guy: Come back cake!
Goomba: WAIT NO-
TRAMPLE!
Kamek: OH! Gourmet Guy has flattened Goomba!
Pokey: Goomba, down.
Kamek: And the cake is running out the door!
Gourmet: CAAAAaaaakkee!
Pokey: Gourmet Guy ran.
Kamek: It was obviously an illusion by Goomba!
Pokey: Winner, Piranha Plant.
Kamek: Win by default!
Piranha Plant: Woo! Lucky!
Larry: Yesss!
SOCK!
Larry: ARH!!! Why did you do that?!
Roy: No reason.
Larry: ARGH!
The winner:
The loser:
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Now you have a choice:
You can go back and memorize the rest
of the battles.
You can go back to the Boxing
Arena, because I know you loved it so much!
Anyone who rats about the conditions
here will be personally pounded by me! If you'd like a pounding, you can
also go back to Lemmy's
Land.
