The Unpeachy Day

By Lemmy Koopa

Chapter 1

The King is throwing a surprise birthday party for one of the castle regulars, Wooster. Wooster is trying his best to enjoy himself, although he repeatedly notices the mess being made.

Of course, no good party would be complete without the attendance of Princess Toadstool, Toad, Mario, and Luigi. Mario and Luigi are spending the party at the food table. The King is sitting on his throne, watching the party.

"This is a great party," says Mario, stuffing another slice of pizza into his mouth.

"You said it," Luigi agrees.

Peach, however, is not taking the party as well as everyone else, with the possible exception of Wooster. She keeps pacing back and forth, trying to figure out what is wrong. Finally, for a lack of anything better to do, she decides to get some cookies, which are in another room of the castle.

"I’m going to get some cookies. Does anyone want to come with me?" Peach asks. Nobody answers. "I guess I’ll go alone then," Peach mutters to herself. As she leaves, Toad runs past her to the kitchen, so that he can restock the now almost empty food table.

It doesn’t take long for Peach to get to the cookie table. "I love cookies," Peach smiles. "Somehow, they always seem to come in handy."

She looks at the cookie table. Her eyes fall upon a large box of Entenmanns Chocolate Chip Cookies. She considers taking the whole box. Then, Peach imagines the bulky Ludwig von Koopa. "Ooh, I don’t want to look like that!" Peach shudders.

(If you think Peach should take just one Cookie, go to chapter 2)

(If you think Peach should take the whole Box of Cookies, go to chapter 3)

(If you don’t think Peach should take any Cookies, go to chapter 33)

Chapter 2

Peach remembers that she has to always watch her figure, so she only helps herself to one cookie. She sighs, as she knows that she would enjoy the whole box of cookies.

Peach wonders if she should eat her cookie. She holds it up in the light and considers her options.

(Peach now has the Cookie!)

(If you think Peach should eat the Cookie, go to chapter 4)

(If you think Peach shouldn’t eat the Cookie go to chapter 5)

Chapter 3

Peach quickly glances around her, and sees that nobody is looking. Quickly, she snatches the box of cookies and stuffs it into one of her dress pockets. She notices a crumb that fell to the floor. "Wooster won’t like this," Peach chuckles. She remembers her present for Wooster: a new vacuum cleaner. He had been asking for one.

Peach reaches into her pocket and removes one cookie, which she eats. Then, she hurries back to the throne room.

(Peach now has the Box of Cookies!)

(Turn to chapter 6)

Chapter 4

Peach decides that she hasn’t come all the way to the other side of the castle just to look at a cookie. She gobbles it up, taking three small bites. Then, she hurries back to the throne room.

(Peach loses the Cookie)

(Turn to chapter 6)

Chapter 5

Peach decides that she isn’t hungry right now (she had just eaten three hamburgers!). She puts the cookie in her dress pocket. She notices a crumb that fell to the floor. "Wooster won’t like this," Peach chuckles. She remembers her present for a Wooster: a new vacuum cleaner. He had been asking for one.

After cleaning the mess, Peach hurries back to the throne room.

(Turn to chapter 6)

Chapter 6

Peach quickly returns to the throne room. Cheerfully, she says, "I’m ba-"

Peach is cut off as she enters the room and sees a mess. The food table has been turned over, and all the food is lying on the floor. The wallpaper has been torn up and the carpet has been stained. Worse than that, Mario, Luigi, and The King are nowhere to be seen.

Peach starts to investigate. She sees two sets of footprints on the previously clean carpet. A trail of small footprints leads up to the overturned food table. A trail of large footprints leads up to... Wooster?

Wooster is lying unconscious on the floor. The large footprints go right over him. Peach bends down and begins slapping Wooster, who promptly comes to. "What happened?" asks Peach.

"I can’t remember," says Wooster, who can’t remember. Then, he begins to cry.

"I’m sorry your party is ruined," says Peach, comfortingly.

"I don’t care about the party," Wooster whimpers, "but look at this mess!"

As soon as Peach is sure that Wooster will be all right (at least physically, anyway) she continues her investigation. She sees that after the small footprints reached the food table, there must have been a large skirmish. Then, the footprints advance to and then through a window that the owner of the footprints had opened. The large footprints advance to the throne, where there is evidence of a small skirmish. Then the footprints continue through the wall of the throne room. Unfortunately, Peach cannot tell who created the hole in the wall. She knows it is a Koopa, though. That is because the culprit can still be faintly seen down the road.

Peach is about to chase after the owner of the large footprints, when she remembers about the small footprints. "What should I do?" Peach wonders.

(If you think Peach should follow the large footprints, go to chapter 7)

(If you think Peach should follow the small footprints, go to chapter 8)

Chapter 7

Peach decides to chase after the Koopa with the large feet. She runs through the hole in the wall and then down the brown dirt road.

Peach can’t recognize the Koopa until it is too late. That is when the Koopa hears her and turns around. With an unconscious King in one arm and a nasty expression on his face, Roy Koopa, Bowser’s nastiest son, stands menacingly in front of our heroine.

"Uh, wrong turn?" asks the princess, knowing she is in trouble.

"Obviously," agrees Roy. With one punch, he knocks out Peach. Then, he picks her up in his other arm and continues down the road.

Game Over!

Chapter 8

Peach decides that the small footprints look safer than the large footprints. She is just about to start out on her adventure when Toad returns from the kitchen with his arms full of food. He is so surprised at what has happened since he left the room that he drops the food on the floor. Wooster cries some more.

It doesn’t take long for Toad to do an investigation of his own. Soon, he says, "I’d like to go, Princess."

"You’re too small," frowns Peach.

"I am not!" exclaims Toad, jumping up and down.

(If you think Peach should go after the footprints, go to chapter 9)

(If you think Toad should go after the footprints, go to chapter 10)

Chapter 9

"I’m sorry Toad, but I’m going. You have to stay here." Toad bows his head and leaves. "I hope I didn’t hurt his feelings," sighs Peach.

She exits the castle through its main doors. She takes three steps, when bricks start to fall on all sides of her. Looking up, she sees the evil Iggy Koopa dropping the bricks. Then, he aims one at her. The brick hits her on the top of her head. Fortunately, Peach’s hard gold crown protects her.

Iggy continues to drop bricks. After a while, the bridge starts to crack under the weight of all the bricks. Suddenly, the bridge breaks. But, instead of falling, the middle of the bridge disappears and a room appears under the bridge. Peach vaguely remembers the secret room under the bridge. She jumps into it. The opening disappears after her.

Peach finds herself in a dark warehouse. After her eyes adjust to the dark, she sees shelves. Each shelf appears to have one of a particular item. Peach sees a sign near one of the shelves. It says:

Only one item per person. By order of Toad, the Royal Mushroom Retainer.

Peach wonders what item she should take. The following items are here: Pizza, Chocolate Bar, Cloud, Whistle, Helmet, Goomba’s Boot, Sledgehammer Suit, Fire Flower, Super Leaf, P Wing, Star, Frog Suit

(If you think Peach should be daring and try to take more than one item, turn to chapter 11)

(If you think Peach is safer just taking one item, turn to chapter 12)

Chapter 10

"All right, Toad, you can go," the princess gives in. "But remember to save the Mario Brothers and The King."

"No problem, Peach," says Toad in a careless manner.

Toad steps out of the castle’s main doors. No sooner does he take three steps then a brick falls right in front of him, and then another and another. Looking up, Toad sees the rotten Iggy Koopa. Before Toad can move, there is a solid brick wall in front of him. Turning around, he sees another brick wall behind him. Because Toad is on the castle’s bridge and can’t swim, Toad can't go left or right. Toad looks up and sees a brick coming down on him. "Uh oh, I’m in tro-"

Ten minutes later, Peach hears a knock on the castle’s doors. She runs to open it, and sees Iggy Koopa. In one hand, he has Toad. In the other hand, he is holding a hungry-looking Piranha Plant. "Your kingdom or Toad," states Iggy, simply.

"Help!" cries Toad. Of course, Peach has no choice.

Five minutes later, Iggy is sitting on the throne. "Emperor Iggy, King Iggy, Lord Iggy... I don’t know. Which title do you like, Peach?"

"Oh, whichever one makes you happy," says Peach with a fake smile, as she fans Iggy with a large feather.

Game Over!

Chapter 11

Peach laughs. "I don’t have to listen to Toad. I’m the princess!" As fast as she can, she takes all of the items in the warehouse. Then, she jumps into a warp pipe. She appears on the side of the bridge opposite the castle. Cheerfully, she continues on her adventure with Iggy shaking his fist behind her.

(Peach now has one of each of the following: Pizza, Chocolate Bar, Cloud, Whistle, Helmet, Goomba’s Boot, Sledgehammer Suit, Fire Flower, Super Leaf, P Wing, Star, Frog Suit!!!)

(Turn to chapter 13)

Chapter 12

Peach frowns because she knows that she could probably use all of the items. Carefully, she selects an item. She chooses one of the following items: Pizza, Chocolate Bar, Cloud, Whistle, Helmet, Goomba’s Boot, Sledgehammer Suit, Fireflower, Super Leaf, P Wing, Star, Frog Suit

Then, she jumps into a warp pipe. She appears on the side of the bridge opposite the castle. Cheerfully, she continues on her adventure with Iggy shaking his fist behind her.

(Peach now has the one item she took!)

(Turn to chapter 13)

Chapter 13

Peach follows the trail of small footprints as they go up and down hills. Unfortunately, Peach isn’t physically prepared for such a long journey, and her high-heeled shoes don’t help.

Just when Peach decides that she can’t go any further, she hears a familiar crunching sound. Peering behind a nearby bush, Peach can see her dinosaur friend, Yoshi, happily eating.

"Hi, Yoshi!" Peach calls.

"Plorp!" exclaims Yoshi, happy to see his person friend.

"Yoshi, I need you to help me rescue Mario, Luigi, and The King."

"Plorp!" snorts Yoshi, stomping one of his feet. He goes back to eating.

Peach climbs aboard Yoshi and kicks him gently with her shoes. Finally, after much coaxing, Yoshi carries Peach for a while. A very short while. After two minutes, Yoshi is so hungry that he refuses to go any further.

"Oh dear," thinks Peach. "What should I do now?"

(If Peach has the Cookie, go to chapter 14)

(If Peach has the Box of Cookies, go to chapter 15)

(If Peach has the Pizza, go to chapter 34)

(If Peach has Cookie(s) and the Pizza, go to chapter 14, 15, or 34)

(If Peach doesn’t have any Cookies or the Pizza, go to chapter 16)

Chapter 14

Peach reaches into her pocket and removes one cookie. She shows it to Yoshi. "Gorp!" Yoshi gobbles up the cookie. "Zorp?"

"Sorry, Yoshi," Peach apologizes. "I don’t have any more cookies."

"Norp!" Yoshi stomps.

He begins to sniff around, looking for more cookies. Soon, he picks up a scent. With Peach trying in vain to stop him, the hungry dinosaur runs off down the road, leaving the footprints behind.

(Peach loses the Cookie)

(Turn to chapter 17)

Chapter 15

Peach reaches into her pocket and removes the box of cookies. She shows the box to Yoshi. Without waiting for Peach to open the box, Yoshi stuffs the cookies, box and all, into his mouth. "Gorp, zorp, morp!" Yoshi smacks his lips. Finally, he agrees to carry the princess on her adventure.

A little further down the road, Peach sees something almost entirely hidden in the bushes. She pulls it out and then continues on her way.

(Peach loses the Box of Cookies)

(Peach now has the Chocolate Bar!)

(Turn to chapter 32)

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