(The episode opens to an urban neighborhood. Two Troopas are escorting Mario and Co, who are in chains and handcuffs, up to a courthouse with the words "JUST US" above the entrance.)
Mario: (in his mind) Plumber's Log, Number 10-51. We were up the creek without a plunger. King Koopa had captured us, and put us on trial for our lives.
(Inside the courtroom, Mario and Co are sitting at a table. Mouser enters the room, dressed as a bailiff.)
Mouser: All rise for his honor, the Dishonorable Judge Koopa! Here come da Koopa.
(The jury, which consists of a Phanto,
a Shy Guy, a Birdo, and a Pokey, all rise. Mario and Co unwillingly rise
as well. Koopa walks in, wearing a judge's robe and a wig. He sits down
at the judge's stand and bangs his
gavel.)
Koopa: Koopa Court is now in session! Bailiff Mouser, read those phony charges you and I cooked up!
(Mouser pulls out a letter and begins to read it.)
Mouser: Mario, Luigi, Princess Toadstool, and Toad: You are charged with disturbing the Koopa, plumbing without a license, and not eating your pasta. How do you plead?
Mario: Not guilty!
Luigi: Not guilty!
Toad: Not guilty!
Princess: Not guilty!
Koopa: Let the record show the four criminals confessed to every crime!
Princess: Koopa, you despicable reptile! We just said we didn't do those things!
(Koopa bangs his gavel and flips through a book.)
Koopa: We got laws in this court against sassing the judge!
Toad: Why do I get the feeling he's gonna throw the book at us?
(Koopa throws the book at Mario and Co's table.)
Koopa: That'll get ya another fifty years!
Mario: Hold it, Koopa! Don't we get to talk in our own defense?
Koopa: You've have... five minutes!
Mario: I'd like to say.
Koopa: Time's up! Has the jury reached a decision in this case?
(The jury talks amongst themselves.)
Koopa: Guilty, you idiots, or I'll feed you to this Piranha Plant!
(Koopa pulls out a potted, chomping Piranha Plant. The jury then nods in agreement.)
Mouser: They say guilty, your judgefulness! Just like we planned!
Koopa: Bailiff Mouser! Prepare the scales of justice for the criminals!
Princess: The real crime is this phony trial!
(Mouser slides open a door, revealing a giant balance scale.)
Koopa: Plumber number 1! Weigh in!
(Mario gets on the scale.)
Mario: Hey! Don't I get to take off my shoes? That's not fair!
(A red arrow on the scale slides all the way up to 500 lbs., and a light flashes.)
Mouser: Five hundred pounds, your honor!
Koopa: Congratulations! You've won a 500-year all expense paid trip to Club Koopatraz! *laugh*
Luigi: Five hundred years in Koopatraz State Prison?!
Mouser: Hey, it could've been life! Relax, you'll be up for parole in a century or two! *laugh*
Koopa: Mouser, show 'em what they've won!
(Mouser presses a button on the wall, and a projector screen falls down, landing on his snout.)
Mouser: OUCH! Oooowwww...
(On the screen, a black and white movie starts playing. The first scene shows the view of a bay area.)
Mouser: Your stay will begin with a cruise across scenic Trouter Bay to the island prison of Koopatraz!
(On the screen, a shot of an island prison is shown.)
Mouser: Best of all, your visit will be uninterrupted by escapes. No one has ever left this world-famous maximum security dungeon alive.
(A shot of the prison's heavy front door is shown, which shifts into color. In this same shot, Mouser and two Troopas are escorting Mario and Co to the door.)
Toad: Well, at least we got rid of that creep-o Judge Koopa!
Mouser: Quiet, fungus! Warden Koopa doesn't allow our prisoners to talk!
Luigi: Warden Koopa?!
(The door opens and Mario gulps. Koopa comes out wearing a warden uniform with a K insignia on his jacket.)
Koopa: It was so much fun being your crooked judge, I decided to become your cruel warden! *laugh* Mouser! Show our convicts to their cells!
(Everyone enters the prison. Cut to a cell block. All of the cells but one are empty. Inside the occupied cell, an old bearded Mushroom grandpa is writing a tally on a wall, which is already full of tallies.)
Gramps: Yep! Let see now. That makes, uh, 54 years, uh, 7 months, and uh, 9 days.
(Mouser, along with two Goombas with nightsticks, arrive at the cell with Mario and Co, who now have numbers on their fronts and backs.)
Mouser: Not you, Princess! Girls have their own cell! Looks like you have company, Gramps!
Gramps: Well, it's about! I've been all alone in this here prision for, uh, thirty years, now, and you know how misery loves company!
(Mouser unlocks the door as the Marios and Toad walk in. He then locks the door behind them.)
Mouser: If you need anything, just yell! Too bad no one will hear you! *laugh*
(Mouser leaves.)
Mario: Hi! I'm Mario! This is my brother, Luigi, and our friend, Toad!
Gramps: Toad?! Uh, say, you wouldn't be related to the Fungusville Toads, would ya?
Toad: Sure! My dad was the top toadstool!
Gramps: You're Moldy's son?
Toad: Yeah! You know him?
Gramps: Well, he's my son! I'm your grandfather!
Toad: Gramps!
Gramps: Grandson!
(The two Mushrooms hug each other and the Marios wipe away tears from their eyes.)
Luigi: Are you crying because you're happy Toad has finally found his grandpa?
Mario: Nope! Sad. 'Cause that's what Toad'll look like in fifty years if we don't get outta here!
(Cut to the prison mess hall. Mario and Co and Gramps are eating at a table. Mario slurps up a bite of gruel from his bowl and rolls his eyes.)
Mario: What is this stuff?
Gramps: Well, uh, they call it "Koopa Surprise", uh, because it looks, and smells, like Koopa!
(Mario bangs the table with his fork in his fist.)
Mario: If Koopa thinks I'm gonna shovel that stuff into my face, he's crazy!
Luigi: Hey! That gives me an idea! We can shovel our way out of Koopatraz with these!
(Luigi holds up his fork.)
Toad: All the way under the bay?! That'd take twenty years!
Princess: So? You have anything better to do, Toad?
Mario: Wait! If we could just tunnel outside the walls, we could hijack one of the boats!
Gramps: Shh! That's a good idea, but they always count the spoons after chow.
Mario: Then we'll just have to create a little distraction!
(Mario jumps onto the table.)
Mario: This food stinks! You eat it!
(Mario picks up his bowl and throws it at a Goomba guard.)
Toad: FOOOOOOOD FIIIIIIIIIGGGHHHT!!!
(Toad throws his bowl at another guard.)
Gramps: Ready... aim... FIRE!
(Gramps, Luigi, and Princess throw their plates at the other guards. One of them gets up and blows his whistle. Koopa and Mouser enter.)
Koopa: So, you don't like the food! In that case, try going without it!
Mario: No food?! For how long?
Koopa: Until I get back from looting the Princess' kingdom! I figure at least ten years! *laugh*
Luigi: Ten years! We'll be goners by then!
Princess: You won't get away with this, Koopa!
Koopa: Of course I will! With the four of you trapped here in Koopatraz, I can rob and pillage all I want! Mouser, take the prisoners back to their cells! And while I'm destroying the Princess' Kingdom, let them starve! *laugh*
(Cut to night. The boys are in their cell, and the Marios are trying to dig their way out.)
Mario: (in his mind) So there we were, prisoners in Koopatraz! Doomed to starve, while Koopa was about to go plunder the Princess' kingdom!
(The Marios pry up a stone tile in the floor.)
Mario: (in his mind) It was time for a jailbreak!
(The Marios remove the tile, which goes flying and lands on Luigi's foot, causing him to yell and hop on his other foot.)
Luigi: YEEOOWCH!!! Sufferin' spumoni!
Gramps: Shhh! You'll wake the Goomba guard!
(Outside the cell, one of the Goombas is asleep on a stool. Back in the cell, the four prisoners start digging a tunnel down and underneath the prison.)
Mario: *pant* Faster! Faster!
(They continue digging. The Goomba then wakes up and goes to check on the cell. The four of them are sitting around the hole, with a bed sheet covered over it, playing cards. The Goomba runs back to his stool and immediately falls asleep again.)
Gramps: Hurry, now! Uh, we gotta our way out, uh, before he wakes up!
(They remove the sheet and jump back in the hole.)
Mario: How much further do we have to dig?
Gramps: Well, let's see! According to my calculations, we should be right outside the front gate!
(Mario climbs up a ladder and digs upwards.)
Mario: We must be close! I hear someone sawing wood!
(In the room above them, Koopa, who's dressed in a cap and nightgown with a blindfold, is sleeping on a cot and snoring away. The cot suddenly pops up, throwing Koopa onto his feet. He wakes up and removes his blindfold.)
Koopa: Hey, hey! What's goin' on? A Koopa needs his beauty sleep!
(Koopa turns on the light, and turns around to see Mario's head sticking out of a hole under the bed. Mario screams.)
Koopa: This better be a bad dream, plumber, 'cause if it's not, you're in deep fettuccini!
(Cut to Princess' cell. Koopa walks up to the door.)
Koopa: Do you know what your friends did? They interrupted my sleep! How can I plunder your kingdom if I don't get my rest?
Princess: What did you do to them, Koopa?
Koopa: When I'm tired, I get cranky. *laugh* I put them in solitary, and gave them 500 more years at hard labor!
(Cut to the next day. The sun is blazing in the sky and the four men are working hard breaking rocks in an outside walled area.)
Mario: *sigh* Koopa's got us breaking stones...
Luigi, Toad, and Gramps: We'd just like to break his bones...
Mario: Koopa's got us working hard...
Luigi, Toad, and Gramps: Ooh we hate that tub of lard!
(Cut to the laundry room. Mouser hits the floor with a whip.)
Mouser: Scrub those duds, peons! Time's a-wasting!
Mario: We're out of soap!
Mouser: Then get some more!
(Mouser cracks his whip again as Mario walks over to a pile of soap bars and takes one. Later...)
Mouser: Attention Koopa-met scrub scum! Time to go back to your cells.
Mario: *whispering* I have got a plan! We're breaking outta here! Be ready to go just before dawn. Pass it along.
(Luigi whispers the message to Toad, who whispers it to Gramps. Cut to their cell. Mario is whittling the soap into the shape of a Bob-omb.)
Mario: Now, a little shoe polish-
(Mario pulls out a container of black shoe polish, sticks his finger in, and coats the Bob-omb with the stuff.)
Mario: -and, I've got a Bob-0mb good enough to fool a Goomba!
(Mario knocks on the door.)
Mario: Help, help! There's a big, ugly spider in here! Help! My yelling's gonna keep you up all night, unless you get this spider outta here!
(The Goomba guard opens the door and enters. Mario walks up to the entrance of the cell and presents the Goomba with his Bob-omb replica.)
Mario: One false move and you're mozzarella, Goomba! Let's have those keys!
Goomba: Woah!
(Mario takes the Goomba's key chain.
Cut to the exterior of the prison at night. The breakout siren and
searchlights turn on. The Marios, Toad,
and Gramps run along the wall, avoiding the spotlight. Cut to Princess'
cell. Mario opens the door and signals her. Cut to outside again, where
the five of them are running past the searchlights. A searchlight stops
on them and they gasp in horror. Goombas come running at them, but Mario
holds out his fake Bob-omb and scares them. However, it starts to rain,
which washes off the shoe polish and causes the soap to foam, so Mario
throws the soap chunk at the Goombas, who are now with Koopa and Mouser,
and runs off. Mario stops at a sewer drain, which he opens up and the group
enters. They come out of a pipe into a room with a giant drain stopper
in the ground. When they pull it out, water floods in. They all swim out
through a pipe into the water and rise out by a dock. They climb into a
rowboat as Koopa runs out of the prison and kicks a real Bob-omb at them.
They cast off as the Bob-omb lands on the dock and explodes. They all laugh
at him and watch the water shoot up and fall onto the island, sinking it.
Koopa and Mouser stand on top of the water tower as the whole island sinks
into the
Trouter-infested waters and swim off
into the sunrise, being chased by the fish.)
Luigi: That's the last of Koopatraz prison!
Toad: You'll never have to go back, Gramps!
Gramps: Yep! I'm a free Mushroom! Free to breathe the air, free to walk the streets!
Mario: Free to buy us dinner! *laugh*
Gramps: Why, sure! As a matter of fact, I, uh, packed us a snack, uh, from the prison mess hall! *laugh*
(Gramps holds up a steel mug and a loaf of bread.)
Gramps: Yep! Bread, uh, and water, all around!
The End
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