(The episode opens to the Marios walking through a snowy region. Behind them is Toad, who is pulling Princess on a sled. Mario is wearing a scarf, Luigi is wearing earmuffs, and Princess is wearing a stole.)

Mario: (in his mind) Plumber's Log, Number 1-0-1. The Land of Ice. Me and my brother, Luigi, had just rescued Princess Toadstool from King Koopa, and were looking for the magic that would set her kingdom free, and get us home to Brooklyn.

(Nearby, an old Birdo that's wearing glasses crashes into a rock and flies into another rock. She then swoops down, grabs Toad with her feet, and flies off with him.)

Birdo: Cheepy! Little Cheepy!

(As the Birdo speaks, saliva goes flying from her mouth.)

Toad: Hey, lemme go! I'm warnin' ya I get airsick! (yelling) Help!

Princess: Oh no! Poor Toad! Bring him back, you dimwitted Birdo!

(The Birdo flies over to some mountains and heads to the top. The Marios and Princess run after her.)

Princess: Look! The Birdo took Toad to the highest peak!

(Princess grabs Mario by his scarf.)

Princess: Please, Mario! Toad saved my life a hundred times! We've got to save his!

Mario: Don't worry, Princess! Luigi and me'll climb that mountain before you can say "spaghetti and meatballs"!

(Mario and Princess walk off.)

Luigi: I can't! I'm allergic to mountains!

Mario: Okay, wait here! And if you become lunch for a polar bear, don't blame us!

Luigi: (nervously) P-polar bear? Lunch?

(Luigi looks around and runs after Mario and Princess. Cut to Toad and the Birdo, who are still up in the air. The song "Surfin' Bird" starts up. The Birdo lands in her home at the top of a mountain, which is basically some wooden planks with some pieces of furniture on it. Toad is dropped into the crib, and the Birdo lets herself fall next to him. The song ends.)

Birdo: Cheepy! My darling little Cheepy! Give mommy a kissums!

(The Birdo picks Toad up and kisses him several times, covering his cheek in her saliva.)

Toad: What're ya tryin' to do, ya wacko bird, ground me?

Birdo: Mommy missed her little Cheepy so much!

Toad: Mommy? You're not my mommy!

(The Birdo hugs Toad, who tries to squirm out of her grasp.)

Birdo: You're such a jokester!

(The phone rings. The Birdo puts Toad back in the crib and walks over to the table.)

Birdo: Now, where did I put that telephone?

(The Birdo reaches around for the phone on the table.)

Birdo: Aha!

(The Birdo picks up the receiver, but she holds the earpiece and mouthpiece away from her face.)

Birdo: Hello?

(The Birdo puts her hand over the mouthpiece and looks back at Toad.)

Birdo: Oh, it's the Missing Bird Bureau!

(She puts the phone up to her face backwards again.)

Birdo: You can call off the search for my missing baby! I found my little sweetums!

(The Birdo picks up a milk carton. On the side is a black and white photo of a baby Birdo, the real Cheepy, which is surrounded by the words "HAVE U SEEN THIS BIRD?". Toad then tries to climb out of the crib.)

Birdo: It was a terrible picture of you anyway, little Cheepy!

(She shows Toad the carton, and he knocks it out of her claw.)

Toad: I'm not your little Cheepy!

Birdo: Oh, Cheepy! Quit kidding around and give mommy a hug!

(The Birdo lunges at Toad, who jumps out of the crib.)

Birdo: Oh, this is a fun game! Kissums! Kissums! Kissums are a-coming!

(She chases Toad around the crib.)

Toad: I gotta get outta here!

(Cut to the Marios and Princess, who are walking towards the base of the mountain. Suddenly, an earthquake starts and splits the ground into two parts, which are now separated by a chasm. The three of them are on one side, and the mountain is on the other.)

Princess: Oh no! We'll never save Toad now!

Luigi: *sob* He was the nicest little fungus I ever knew!

Mario: Luigi, we can't quit now! Remember the plumber's motto!

Luigi: Who could forget? Don't take chances, or you'll go down the drain!

Mario: No! When the pipe is plugged, keep plungin'! Pasta power!

(Mario runs back a bit, then backs towards the chasm, and does a long jump over to the other side.)

Mario: Come on, Princess! You can do it too!

Princess: Pasta power!

(Princess runs back and does a long jump over the chasm as well.)

Luigi: *gulp* Mamamia!

(Luigi then does a long jump over the chasm. When he lands over the other side, he nearly falls over the edge.)

Luigi: Woah!

(Princess grabs Luigi and saves him from falling.)

Luigi: Whew!

Mario: See? I told ya we'd be perfectly safe!

(Up on a cliff, two Flurries on skis are spying on them through binoculars.)

Flurry: It's them! Princess Toadstool and those two faucet freaks! Come on, Flaky! Let's tell King Koopa, so we can put 'em on ice for good!

(The Flurries ski off. Cut to Koopa's nearby castle, which is made of ice. Koopa is at his throne with the Flurries.)

Koopa: Well at last you two powder puffs did something right!

Flurry: Thank you, your extremist, most royal, and regal Koopaness!

Koopa: Watch it, soldier! When I want my feet licked, I'll ask for it! I want my feet licked!

(The Flurries start licking Koopa's feet like mad.)

Koopa: This will be the last time those pinhead plumbers throw a monkey wrench into my evil plans! *laugh*

(Koopa picks up a CB radio and speaks into it.)

Koopa: Attention, Koopa Troopas! It's air raid time!

(Outside, several Albatoss that are wearing headphones hear Koopa. Cut to the Birdo's home. The Birdo is in a rocking chair holding Toad, forcing him to drink from a bottle.)

Birdo: Rock-a-bye little Cheepy, on the mountain so high! If you get lost again, your mommy will cry!

(Toad pulls the bottle out of his mouth.)

Toad: I can't be your little Cheepy, lady! I don't have wings!

(Toad flaps his arms.)

Toad: Look, no wings, no feathers! I'm just a Mushroom that can't stand heights!

Birdo: Oh, Cheepy! You're such a teaser!

(The Birdo kisses Toad several times and hugs him. A human head pops out of a cuckoo clock on the wall, shouting "Cuckoo! Cuckoo!")

Birdo: I almost forgot! It's time for your flying lessons!

Toad: Flyin' lessons? Are you outta your mind?

(Cut to the Marios and Princess, who are climbing a cliff. When they reach the top, they start hopping up several ledges in the form of a staircase. They then start walking up a hill.)

Princess: I just hope we can reach Toad before something terrible happens to him!

Luigi: Or to us!

Mario: Cheer up, Luigi! It could be worse!

Luigi: Worse? How could it be worse?

(One of the Albatoss flies overhead and drops a Bob-omb in front of the group.)

Luigi: M-m-mario! It's a Bob-omb!

Mario: And I was hopin' for a nice salami sandwich!

(Mario knocks the Bob-omb at the Albatoss, and it explodes, knocking the Albatoss out.)

Princess: Oh no! King Koopa must've found us!

Luigi: Look out! Here comes a whole squadron of King Koopa's Bob-ombers!

(The rest of the Albatoss drop their Bob-ombs around the group. The three of them knock the Bob-omb aside before they blow up.)

Mario: Good goin', guys!

(Princess points to three Albatoss that are ahead of them.)

Princess: Not good enough! Those other Albatoss are up to something!

(The Albatoss drop Bob-ombs, which blow up and create an avalanche which comes right at the group.)

Luigi: It's an avalanche! Let's get outta here!

(The three of them run down the hill.)

Mario: I hate to run on an empty stomach!

(The three of them run past a door in a rock. They then run back to the door and close it, just as the avalanche passes them. Inside the cave, the Marios are struggling to keep the door closed, but the force of the avalanche is too strong and some snow breaks through, trapping them in the cave.)

Princess: We're trapped! Now how do we save Toad?

(Cut to the Birdo, who is flying in the air holding Toad in her talons.)

Toad: You're not listenin', lady! I don't want flyin' lessons!

Birdo: Mommy knows best, little Cheepy!

Toad: Look, lady! I got ten gold coins! They're yours if you just let me go!

Birdo: I'll let you go, sweetums, at 30,000 feet!

(Toad gasps and covers his eyes. Cut to the cave. Mario is trying to pull Luigi out of the snow.)

Princess: Look, a Fire Flower!

(Princess points to a Fire Flower on a ledge.)

Mario: I'm hungry enough to eat anything!

Princess: No, it's magic! If you can reach it, you can become a Super Mario, and get special fire power that can destroy King Koopa's evil helpers!

Mario: That's easy! Come on, Luigi!

(Mario pulls Luigi out of the snow.)

Mario: Pattycake, pattycake, pasta man! Give me pasta power as fast as you can!

(The Marios do their little routine.)

Mario: Pasta power!

(Luigi tosses Mario up onto the ledge. Mario touches the Fire Flower and powers up to Super Mario.)

Mario: I love when that happens!

(Mario jumps off of the ledge and shoots some fireballs at the snow, creating a tunnel.)

Mario: Follow me!

(They head into the tunnel. Cut to Koopa's throne room, where Koopa is with the three Albatoss, who are
wearing medals.)

Koopa: For badness below and behind the call of cruelty, I, the devious King Koopa, bestow these medals of the double cross!

(The two Flurries return.)

Flurry: We have important news, your royal Koopaness! The princess and her plumbers survived the avalanche!

Koopa: THEY WHAT?! You bumbling beak geeks blew it!

(Koopa pulls the medals off of the Albatoss.)

Koopa: I'LL HAFTA LEAD THE NEXT ATTACK MYSELF!

(Cut to the Marios and Princess, who are outside sitting down on a ledge.)

Mario: I'd pay two hundred bucks for a nice pepperoni cheesecake right now!

(Nearby, the real Cheepy, who is frozen in a block of ice, lets out a little cry.)

Cheepy: Cheep! Cheep!

Mario: Who called me cheap? I'd pay three hundred bucks!

(Princess sees Cheepy and walks over to him.)

Princess: Look!

Luigi: What is that thing?

Princess: It's a baby Birdo, Luigi! And it needs our help! It's frozen inside the ice!

Mario: Stand back!

(Mario melts the ice with a few fireballs. Cheepy shivers and starts crying.)

Cheepy: M-m-mommy! Little Cheepy want mommy!

(Princess takes off her stole and wraps it around Cheepy.)

Princess: Do you think his mommy is the one who took Toad?

(Cut to the Birdo and Toad, who are still up in the air.)

Birdo: Here we are, little Cheepy! 30,000 feet! Now mommy will let you fly! Happy landings!

Toad: Lady, I'm not a bird..

(The Birdo drops Toad.)

Toad: The least that featherbrain coulda done was lend me a parachute! Hey, that's it! A parachute!

(Toad takes off his hat and uses it as a parachute. Down below, the Marios, Princess, and Cheepy are sitting by a fire. Toad lands in front of them, knocking them into the snow.)

Princess: Toad! Are you all right?

(Toad puts his hat back on.)

Toad: I feel great! I just passed my first flyin' lesson!

(Cheepy sticks his head out of the snow.)

Toad: Hey! It's me! I mean, him! It's little Cheepy! The Birdo's real lost baby!

Cheepy: Little Cheepy want his mommy!

Princess: Toad, do you know where his mommy is?

Toad: Oh no! I'm not goin' back up there! Never!

Cheepy: *cries* Mommy! I want my mommy!

Toad: Okay, okay! Maybe if I take you back, she'll leave me alone!

Mario: Start climbing, paisano! We'll stay here and keep King Koopa occupied!

Princess: King Koopa? Where?

(Koopa drives up the hill on a snowmobile. Some Troopas run after him and are followed by some Flurries on skis.)

Luigi: Hey, Super Mario! Super cook their goose!

(Mario shoots the snow with fireballs, creating holes that the Flurries fall into.)

Koopa: Koopa Troopa Pack, attack! Put out that super plumber's fire!

(The Flurries ski up to Mario, who shoots them with fireballs. An Albatoss drops a Bob-omb next to Mario. It blows up, causing him to lose his power.)

Mario: Whoops!

Princess: Don't worry, Mario! We'll beat 'em without super powers!

(The Flurries and Troopas surround them.)

Luigi: It's too late, Princess! They got us surrendered!

Koopa: *laugh* It's all over, scum scrubbers!

(A turnip hits an Albatoss that's next to Koopa.)

Koopa: Who threw that vegetable?

Birdo (off screen): We did!

(The song "Surfin' Bird" starts up again. The Birdo is holding Toad and a sack of turnips. Toad throws some more turnips.)

Koopa: Retreat! Retreat!

(The Birdo lands and kisses Cheepy.)

Birdo: Come on, sweeties! We've got to make the world safe for little Cheepy! Let's get those insects!

(The Birdo flies off with Mario and Toad.)

Toad: When I told her how you rescued her baby, she wanted to help!

(Mario and Toad toss turnips at the minions.)

Koopa: I'll be back! You haven't heard the last of King Koopa!

Toad: Thanks, lady! We couldn't have done it without ya!

Birdo: You saved my little Cheepy! Would you like to come to dinner?

Mario: Dinner? That's the best news I've heard in days!

(The song ends. Cut to the Birdo's home. Mario and Co and Cheepy are sitting at the table, and the Birdo is holding a plate with a worm on it.)

Birdo: I cooked this just for you, Mario! My favorite recipe!

(The Birdo places the plate in front of Mario.)

Mario: My favorite dish, spaghetti!

Worm: Spaghetti? We're not spaghetti! We're worms!

Mario and Co: WORMS?

(The four of them run off.)

Worm: I've never been so insulted in my whole life!

(The episode opens to Mario and Luigi standing in front of the medicine cabinet. Mario fixes his moustache up through the mirror.)

Mario: Time for a new day! But as we always say; Neatness counts!

Luigi: That's right, Mario! And by the way, you have a little piece of spaghetti on your overalls.

(Luigi removes a noodle off of Mario's overalls.)

Mario: Why thank you, Luigi! And you have a little spaghetti sauce on your shirt, as usual!

(Mario points to a spaghetti sauce stain on Luigi's shirt by his shoulder.)

Luigi: Oh, really? Well your shoes are dirty!

Mario: Your socks don't match!

Luigi: Eh, ya got five cavities!

Voice: Hello?

Mario: Hello?

Luigi: I didn't say hello!

Mario: I didn't either!

Voice: Well I did!

(The Marios look around, trying to figure out where the voice is coming from.)

Voice: Over here!

(Mario opens the medicine cabinet and sees Nicole Eggert on the other side.)

Nicole: Hi, are you the Mario Bros?

Mario: We sure are!

Luigi: Wow! You're Nicole Eggert! We watch your show all the time! Mario and I are your biggest fans!

Mario: What are you doing in the medicine cabinet?

Nicole: Well, I'm checking the expiration date on your toothpaste. It's very important, you know. Can I come in?

Mario: Sure, come on in!

(Mario closes the medicine cabinet.)

Luigi: Wow, Nicole Eggert!

(Nicole is now in the basement and she walks up to the Marios, holding a newspaper.)

Nicole: Well it says right here that you two are the best plumbers in Brooklyn and quite possibly the world!

(The front page of the newspaper has an ad that reads "SUPER MARIO BROTHERS The Best Plumbers in Brooklyn and quite possibly the World! You clog 'em, we clear 'em 212-555-CLOG". Luigi whistles and says something to Mario under his breath.)

Luigi: Yes, Nicole, that is absolutely true! Not only that, but we are also very, very neat and clean. In fact, what do we always say, Mario?

Mario: Hey, you slob! That's my pizza!

Luigi: No, no, no! Neatness counts!

Mario: Oh yeah!

Nicole: Good. I need my kitchen sink fixed!

Mario: Ya certainly come to the right place! We'll demonstrate right now just how good we are, with absolutely no obligation!

Nicole: Well, I really don't have much time! See, I'm on my way to a party!

Mario: Well this'll only take a second! Hey, as you can see here, we have a clogged sink!

(Mario leads Nicole over to the sink in the center of the room.)

Mario: And uh, let me fix it in a few seconds! Luigi!

(Mario hands Luigi a wrench.)

Mario: Begin!

(Luigi starts turning the wrench on the pipe under the sink, while Mario waits with Nicole.)

Luigi: Hey, hey, hey!

Mario: Hey, I'll do it, it's stuck! I'll do it.

(Mario bends down and takes over Luigi's job.)

Nicole: Look, I really should be going!

Mario: Wait, wait! This'll only just take a few seconds!

(Mario and Luigi turn the wrench together. They loosen the pipe, but water comes flying out of the sink, soaking Nicole.)

Mario and Luigi: Uh oh!

Luigi: Oh, Nicole, I'm so sorry! This never, ever happened before!

Mario: Oh yeah? What about the time when we drenched the mailman?

Luigi: (without opening his mouth) Will you please.

(Nicole walks over to a chair with a cake on it. Just as she's about to sit down, Luigi runs over to her and grabs her.)

Luigi: No! Oh no! No! No sitting! *laugh* Why don't you come up here and-and-and stay by the furnace? It's nice and warm. It'll dry you off. I'll move the cake.

(Luigi leads Nicole over to the furnace and places the cake on the floor. The furnace then sneezes some smoke all over Nicole.)

Mario: Oh, Nicole! I'm sorry! It does that once in a while!

(Mario leads Nicole back to the chair.)

Luigi: Oh, oh Nicole! This is terrible! Come over here!

(Nicole steps on the cake, getting her shoe covered in it.)

Mario: Your foot's having a birthday!

Luigi: This is terrible! Come over here! Oh, guys, this is terrible! Oh, have a seat!

(Luigi leads Nicole over to another chair, which has a pizza on it. Nicole sits down on the chair, but gets up and reveals that her pants have been stained.)

Luigi: Oh no! Oh, Nicole! Over here, I'll get the chair clean!

(Luigi leads Nicole over to the side. She is now under the garbage chute, which dumps a load of garbage on her.)

Mario: This is terrible!

Luigi: Yeah, but somehow on her it looks good!

(Later, Nicole dusts the dirt off of her body, while Mario is eating away at the cake from ealier.)

Mario: We'll pay for everything!

Nicole: No, don't worry about it!

Luigi: Oh, please Nicole! We'll do all your plumbing for free!

Nicole: No, really! It's okay!

Mario: We'll make ya free pizza!

Luigi: Yeah, we'll wash your clothes!

Mario: We'll make your bed! We'll brush your teeth!

Nicole: Boys, I told you not to worry about it! See, actually, this is perfect!

Mario: It is?

Nicole: Yeah! Remember how I was telling you I was going to a party?

Luigi: Yeah.

Nicole: Well, it's a sloppy party! See, the person who dresses the sloppiest wins! You saved me a trip of picking up a costume! The sloppier, the better!

Mario and Luigi: Really?

Nicole: Really.

Luigi: Well in that case...

(The Marios and Nicole grab chunks of the cake and start smearing it all over Nicole, all while cheering and laughing.)

Luigi: Wow, is this fun!

(Soon, Nicole has cake all over her clothes and in her hair.)

Luigi: 'Til next time, everybody.

Mario, Luigi, and Nicole: Do the Mario!

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