(Camera fades to show a huge jungle area. Mario and his friends are riding a balloon not similar to the one in Super Mario Advance 2. Mario is looking through a telescope.)

Mario: (in his mind) Plumber's log, number 1938. Our adventure-loving group had arrived in Jungleland. We were searching for a legendary statue with magical powers: The Lost Mushroom. Only trouble was, Koopa was looking for it too.

Princess: They say the Lost Mushroom will grant the wishes of whoever possesses it. We've got to find it before the evil Koopa.

Toad: Easier said than done, Princess babe. This place is really primitive.

Mario: You can say that again. I don't see one pizza parlor.

Luigi: Uh oh! Trouble flying this way!

(The group looks up. An Albatoss is zooms by, barely missing them.)

All: An Albaross!

Toad: Watch out, dudes! That feathery foe works for Koopa!

(The Albatoss swoops down and claws a hole right in their balloon, making a leak.)

Luigi: We're leaking like a split drainpipe!

Princess: Hand on! We're going to crash!

(Everyone hangs on to the ropes as the balloon falls. It lands on some suspicious yellow ground.)

Mario: (coming out of the balloon's remains) Wahoo! That was more fun than getting flushed down the sewer!

(As everyone comes out, Toad hops up and down a few times.)

Toad: I'm just glad to be on solid ground!

(When Toad hops again, he lands in the ground, revealing it to be none other than quicksand. The other start sinking.)

Luigi: Calamituous calamari! We've landed in a pond of quicksand!

Toad: (to the viewers, er, readers of this script) Boy, did you ever have one of those days?

(A rope with a weird claw at the end appears out of nowhere and snatches Toad away. Toad lands on REAL dirt and the owner of the rope has no face.)

Toad: Woah! Who are you, hero dude?

No face: The bravest, baddest treasure hunter in Jungleland: Indiana Joe!

Princess: Treasure hunter?

Mario: Can you help us find the Lost Mushroom?

Indiana Joe: Piece of cake, Jake!

Luigi: Good, now that that's settled... help!

(Toad gasps, but Indiana Joe uses the rope to get everyone out. Meanwhile, Koopa is viewing the action with his binoculars.)

Koopa: Looks like Indiana Joe is gonna lead those sewer-swimming saps to the Lost Mushroom!

(Camera reveals that Koopa is wearing some sort of hunting costume, with a Nazi logo edited to look like a K.)

Koopa: That guy knows the location of every hidden treasure in Jungleland, and every shortcut to them.

(Camera cuts to view the henchmen, but Mouser and a Troopa are wearing hunting clothes. Triclyde is with them, but he's not wearing anything.)

Mouser: Rotten cheeseballs! They're bound to reach the Lost Mushroom before us!

Koopa: That statue was left to me by my great-great-grand Koop. It's mine! And those plumb bums ain't gonna have it!

Triclyde: What are we gonna do, Colonel Von Koop?

Koopa: We're gonna follow those faucet-fixing fools, and when they find the Lost Mushroom, we're gonna take it away from them! Hahahaha!

(The henchmen look at each other, then face Koopa.)

Mouser: Geez, boss. That's stealing!

Troopa: Yeah.

Triclyde: That's right.

Koopa: Of course that's stealing, you dumbkopfs. We're badguys! We're supposed to steal!

(He then hits them with the same kind of rope Indiana Joe had.)

Troopa: Oh yeah.

Triclyde: That's right.

Mouser: I forgot.

Koopa: Boy, good henchmen are really hard to find.

(Camera cuts to a strange-looking temple, shaped like Koopa's head. The weird things surrounding the area look like fences.)

Indiana Joe: Here it is, the Temple of Koopa!

Mario Gang: The Temple of Koopa?

Indiana Joe: It was built by the evil reptile's great-great-grand Koop. Inside is the Lost Mushroom.

Mario: Well, what are we waiting for? Let's steal the statue and scram!

Indiana Joe: No way, ray. (shakes) That place is terrifying, dangerous, and just plain icky. I don't mind leading you here, but I'm not going inside!

Mario: I thought you weren't afraid of anything!

Indiana Joe: Almost anything. I have Koopa-phobia.

Mario Gang: Koopa-phobia?!

Indiana Joe: When I see a Koopa, I turn yellow as a canary's belly!

Mario: Wait here, my treasure-hunting pal. We'll nail that statue and be back quicker than you can say "Garlic gumdrops".

(The gang runs inside the temple.)

Mario: Come on, gang. It's up to us to find the Lost Mushroom.

Princess: I wonder what Indiana Joe is afraid of. This is just an old cave.)

(A rock suddenly drops, blocking the entrance to where they came from.)

Luigi: Huh? We're trapped, like pasta in a spaghetti feed.

(A fireball shoots towards them. It misses them, hitting the wall.)

Toad: Trouble city, dudes! Look!

(A fireball with a face on it flies down the hallway.)

All: A Fryguy!

Princess: Come on, it's flee or fry time!

(They start running. They dodge some more fireballs, until they notice something.)

Luigi: Snakes alive! Look!

All: A Cobrat!

Mario: Jump!

(As they jump over the jar the Cobrat's hiding in, the Cobrat tries to bite them, but fails. They run into a tunnel and use a huge boulder to block the tunnel. Fryguy looks at it and goes away.)

Toad: Whew! That was close, dudes!

Princess: Look!

(She points to a yellow statue resembling Toad, only... uglier.)

All: The Lost Mushroom!

(Mario picks it up.)

Princess: We did it! We found the Lost Mushroom!

Luigi: Now all we've got to do is find a way out of this spooky place.

Mario: Yeah. I sure wish there was a trapdoor around here.

(The statue glows.)

Luigi: Look! The Lost Mushroom is answering Mario's wish!

(The floor they're standing in glows, and they fall in. Camera cuts to outside. A huge stone tongue folds out. The gang rolls outside. Mario stands up triumphantly.)

Mario: We did it! We beat old Koopa Stoopa to the Lost Mushroom!

Koopa: Don't be so sure!

(Koopa grabs the Lost Mushroom out of Mario's hand.)

Koopa: Reach for it, plumb scum! Your pipe patching days are over!

(As he talks, Troopa, Mouser, and Triclyde stand with him. Triclyde hisses, while Troopa and Mouser hold up two Cobra gun things. The Mario Gang wave their arms in surrender. Fade to a treehouse.)

Mario: Let us go, Von Koopa, or you'll end up in rotten ravioli!

Koopa: (sarcastically) Ohh, I'm so scared! Hahaha! Please don't hurt me, Mr. Bilge Brain!

(He, Mouser, Troopa, and Triclyde laugh.)

Koopa: So long, spaghetti suckers! Have a nice doomsday!

(They leave the treehouse, locking the door behind them with the Marios inside)

Princess: I wonder what that green meany has cooked up for us this time.

Luigi: Suffering spumoni! Look!

(A trapdoor appears a few feet away from our heroes.)
[Note: How on Plit did Luigi know that the trapdoor was going to open?]

(A lion with a mask jumps out and roars.)

All: It's a Shy Guy Lion!

Toad: And the dude thinks we're lunch!

Mario: Hang in there, gang! We haven't gone down the drain yet! Luigi, hand me your plumber snake!

(Luigi hands it him.)
[Note: Contrary to what Mario says, he means a rope, like the one Indiana Joe had.]

Luigi: Wh-wh-what are you going to do?

Mario: I'm going to tame this beastly beasty!

(The lion leaps at Mario, but Mario hits the lion with the rope. The lion lays down and meows.)

Toad: Way to go, lion-taming dude! Now get us out of here!

Mario: You heard the fungus, pussy-cat! Set us free!

(The lion crashes through the door.)

Princess: Now we've got to find a way to beat Colonel Von Koopa!

Toad: We can't do it alone! As long as the dude has the Lost Mushroom, he's too powerful!

Mario: Maybe Indiana Joe can help. Let's find him and help him overcome his Koopa-phobia!

(They leave the scene. They reach a small hut with a mailbox outside.)

Luigi: This must be where Indiana Joe lives.

Toad: I think you're right, dude. Look.

(They read the sign.)

All: Indiana Joe. Babysitter?!

(They look inside the hut. Sure enough, there are baby toys strewn around, as Indiana Joe sits in his chair holding three Mushroom babies.)

Mario: Indiana Joe, what's going on?

Indiana Joe: A guy with Koopa-phobia can't be a treasure hunter. So I've decided to give it up and go into babysitting.

Princess: But we need your help. We can't defeat Colonel Von Koopa alone.

(The babies start attacking Indiana Joe with teddy bears and rattles.)

Indiana Joe: Ouch! Ow! Hey! That hurts! Ouch ouch ow! That does it!

(He sets them on the chair and runs to the group.)

Indiana Joe: I'm with you, guys. Koopa may be scary, but he's nothing compared to these brats! (a block is thrown at him) Ow! Let's get out of here!

(The gang dashes out of the house of evil toy-tossing toddlers. Meanwhile, Koopa and his minions are in an open field with the Lost Mushroom)

Koopa; Okay, my Koopa Pack. Let's see what the Lost Mushroom can do! Mushroom, Mushroom, do as you're told, build me a castle of solid gold!

(The statue glows, and a huge poorly built castle made of gold appears in the field.)

Koopa: Fan-Kooping-tastic! It worked! *evil laugh*

Triclyde: Wow! A 14-Karat castle!

Mouser: I wonder if that Mushroom would make me one out of cheese!

Koopa: With this fantastic fungus, I'll be the richest Koopa that ever Kooped! *laugh*

(A claw on a rope snatches the statue away.)

Mario: Don't count your reptiles before they're hatched, lizard lips!

(Koopa grumbles, but sees Indiana Joe, Princess, and Toad with ropes with claws.)

Koopa: Suffering salamanders! It's those pasta-pulverizing plumbers!

Mario: That's right, Von Koopa! Put this in your pipe and plug it!

(He misses trying to hit Koopa with the rope, and Koopa pulls out a mini-Cobra gun. Triclyde goes with shooting fireballs. Mario and Indiana Joe surround Koopa. Princess dodges Triclyde's attacks. She ropes Triclyde's neck and somehow gets enough strength to swing him away. Luigi fights Troopa, dodging the mini-Cobra's ammo. Luigi then grabs ahold of Troopa with his rope and swings him away too. Toad then fights Mouser, dodging more attacks. Toad does the same thing as the others: Grabs Mouser with his rope and swings him so hard, he gets tossed away. Indiana Joe snatches the mini-Cobra and Mario smacks Koopa with the rope. Koopa starts to sweat as the others walk to him, ropes armed. Koopa takes a potion out and tosses it onto the ground, forming a hole. He jumps in as the hole disappears.)

Luigi: Miserable manicotti! The Koopa's escaped into a Warp Zone!

Mario: Yeah, but we sure whipped him this time!
[When Mario talks, the hole that Koopa jumped into is still there, even though it faded away when Koopa jumped in. And the thing is, the others are standing on top of it like it wasn' t there!]

(They go back to the house. Mario's inside, and Indiana Joe gives the sign to Toad.)

Indiana Joe: Thanks pals, for helping me get rid of my Koopa-phobia!

Toad: Don't mention it, ex-babysitting dude!

(Toad throws the sign into the stream.)

Princess: Say, what happened to the Lost Mushroom? It was right there a second ago!

(Inside the hut, Mario holds the Lost Mushroom up.)

Mario: Mushroom, Mushroom, now if not fasta, fill this hut with tons of pasta!

(The statue glows, and pasta starts filling the hut. Mario comes out of the pile.)

Mario: (while eating) Me and this Lost Mushroom are gonna get along just fine!

(Iris out.)

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