Mechakoop Calamity

By Iggy Koopa

December 18, 2010

(Yoshi, Mario, Luigi, Princess and Oogtar are walking through the forest.)

Princess: Mario, Luigi - Koopa hasn’t attacked in awhile. I’m getting worried that he’s planning something.

Mario (while Luigi is scratching a Koopa-shaped target into a tree): Don’t worry, Princess! If he attacks, we’ll take ‘im with this!

(Mario throws a plunger at the finished target, but misses.)

Mario: Uh… Let me try that again.

(He continues throwing plungers at the target and missing until Oogtar takes one.)

Oogtar: Let me try this, Mario!

(Oogtar throws one and hits Koopa right in the head.)

Oogtar: That’s how you do it.

Mario (grumbling): Showoff.

Princess: Thank you, Oogtar, Mario; but I’m still worried about it.

(Meanwhile, Kooky, Hip and Hop are showing Koopa a new invention.)

Hip: We call it…

Hop: …the Mechakoop!

Kooky: I supplied the tools.

Hip: While we…

Hop: …put it together.

Koopa: Uh… yeah. What does it do?

Kooky: Well, King Dad, it has a giant plunger-

(Hip presses a button on the remote and a plunger pops out of Mechakoop’s hand.)

Kooky: -that can pick up Mario and his friends!

(Hop presses a button and the plunger sticks to Koopa’s head.)

Hip: Well, Dad?

Hop: Do you like it?

Koopa: Yes, but…

(The camera zooms out to the entire kingdom, where Koopa’s angry voice can still be heard.)
Koopa: TELL IT TO PUT ME DOWN!!!

(The camera zooms back in to the castle, where the little Koopas have fallen over, Kooky’s hair is even more messed up, Hop’s glasses are smashed, and Hip’s curled into a small ball.)

Kooky, Hip, and Hop: Yes Dad!

(They immediately begin pressing buttons, causing Koopa to be smashed into ceilings, walls, and floors.)

Koopa: STOP! STOOOOOOP!!!

(We come back to Mario and friends, where Yoshi and Oogtar are playing tag while Mario, Luigi, and Princess are cleaning up a picnic ground.)

Mario: Well, Princess, seems like you were wrong about Koopa.

Princess: It still worries me. We should keep our eyes peeled.

Luigi: Hey Mario, Princess! I think that I see the Koopas!

(Mario and Princess run over to Luigi and we see Koopa inside Mechakoop, with Kooky, Hip, and Hop explaining how it works.)

Koopa: So, when I see those pesky plumbers and the Princess, I press this button?

Kooky: No!

Hip: Never…

Hop: …press that button!

Koopa: Why?

Kooky: It’s the Self-Destruct button!

Hip: When we see you’re close enough to Mario and his friends…

Hop: …we’ll press this button and it will automatically pick them up!

Koopa: Oh. I just have one question.

Kooky, Hip, and Hop: Yes?

Koopa: Why did you put a Self-Destruct on in the first place?

Kooky: So that when we capture Mario and his friends inside of its chest…

Hip: …we can…

Hop: …blow them up!

Koopa: That’s even more annoying when you all do it.

Kooky: Sorry…

Hip: …King…

Hop: …Dad.

Koopa: Grrrrrr!!!

(Kooky, Hip, and Hop hide behind trees as the camera goes back to Mario, Luigi, and the Princess.)

Princess: I told you!

Mario: Hey, how was I supposed to know?!

Luigi: Guys! Shhhhh!!!

Princess: You could’ve listened to me!

Mario: I did! Then I didn’t see them!

Luigi: Guuys!!!

Princess and Mario: WHAT?!

(Luigi points behind them and they see Mechakoop with the plunger.)

Mario, Princess, and Luigi: Uh oh…

(The camera goes back to Yoshi and Oogtar.)

Yoshi (tagging Oogtar): Oogtar it!

Oogtar: Hey Yoshi, where’s the others?

Yoshi: Yoshi no know.

Oogtar: We’d better look for them.

(They go over to the bushes and see Mechakoop shoving Mario, Luigi, and the Princess into his chest.)

Yoshi: Yoshi no think that good.

Oogtar: I agree. Let’s follow them.

(The camera goes to Koopa’s Castle to show Koopa explaining to his captives what will happen.)

Kooky: You see that red button on our remote? That’s the self-destruct.

Hip: We’re gonna push it…

Hop: …and blow you up!

(Mario, Luigi and Princess gasp in fear.)

Princess: You won’t get away with this! Someone will save us!

Koopa: Like who?

(He and his children laugh evilly.)

Mario: Princess! Where are Yoshi and Oogtar?

Princess: They were playing tag in the field. Koopa must not have seen them! I’ll lure Yoshi with this apple.

(She pulls an apple out of her pocket. We see Yoshi and Oogtar hiding behind a corner.)

Yoshi: Did Oogtar hear that?

Oogtar: Yeah! They’re gonna blow ‘em up!

Yoshi: Not that. Yoshi mean the apple!

(Oogtar sighs.)

Yosbi: Ok, Yoshi get it. Yoshi know we save Mario, Luigi, and Princess.

Oogtar: But how?

Yoshi: Yoshi have idea.

(They huddle for awhile and mumble…)

Oogtar: Good idea!

(The camera goes back to Koopa, Kooky, Hip, and Hop.)

Koopa: Wait… Where’s that silly dino and his caveman friend?

Kooky: We didn’t see them.

Koopa: WELL FIND THEM!!!

Hip: Yes sir…

Hop: ...King Dad!

(We see that Yoshi and Oogtar have been sneaking around the castle.)

Yoshi: Um… Yoshi no think this good.

(Kooky, Hip, and Hop see Yoshi and Oogtar and begin chasing them as Michael Jackson’s “Beat It” plays. As the chase continues, Oogtar sneaks over to Mechakoop and begins clubbing it. Mario, Luigi, and Princess jump out and Oogtar piles up the parts. Yoshi eats the pile and begins spitting gears and metal plates at Kooky, Hip, Hop, and Koopa. They’re trapped in the pile and the song ends.)

Koopa: Grah! Kids! As soon as we escape, YOU’RE GROUNDED!

Kooky, Hip, and Hop: Aw…

(Kooky begins pulling parts out of the pile to spare them for another day. Yoshi eats all of them and spits them into the cage part of Mechakoop (which they had saved), and Mario hits the Self-Destruct button.)

Mechakoop: Self-Destruct in 5… 4… 3… 2… 1…

Koopa, Kooky, Hip and Hop: NOOOOOOO!!!

(They’re blasted through the roof and land in the ocean, where they get chased by a Cheep Cheep.)

Mario: Well, we won’t be seein’ them for awhile.

Luigi: Agreed.

(They all walk off into the sunset and the credits play.)

The End

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