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Millenium Star

Season Nine, Round One, Battle 5
The Red Corner

Millenium Star
Games: Mario Party 3
Sports Hall: 2-0, Current One-Week Champion, Unranked
(more info)

The Green Corner



The Yellow Corner



The Blue Corner

Games: Super Mario RPG
Sports Hall: 0-1
(more info)


Waluigi: Welcome to Waluigi’s never-ending cavalcade of Waluigi! Waluigi is sorry, audience, that he cannot fight today.

Roy: It really hurts to say this, but I’m kind of sad about that myself. It’s not like these two guys are any better.

Larry: Yeah, at least it’s FUNNY when you get hurt.

Waluigi: Waluigi will take that as a compliment.

Roy: Yeah, that’s about the best you’re going to be getting. Now announce the fighters already, I want to go home.

Waluigi: In the Red Corner is the guy who stole all Waluigi’s coins!

Millennium Star: Ho ho ho! You should know well that Chance Time is truly as fair as it could be!

Waluigi: And in the Blue Corner is a stupid bow guy who doesn’t matter!

Bowyer: Nya, nya! A victor I shall be, nya!

Roy: Who ya got, Larry?

Larry: Well–

Roy: Larry?


Roy: Larry! Can you hear me?


Waluigi: Waluigi thinks he cannot respond to you.

Roy: This is terrible! What’s the point in punching him if he’s not going to be hurt?!

Bowyer: Nyah, frozen he is! What fun!

Roy: Hmph. Let’s just get started. Pokey!

Pokey: …

Roy: You froze Pokey too?!

Bowyer: Lucky, I am! The cactus was very shifty, nya!

Roy: What did he ever do to you?! Millennium Star, get him back!

Bell Ringer: Uh–


Bowyer: Nyah! Arrows for you!


Millennium Star: An interesting gambit, but one that is doomed to fail. Warp Block!

Fwoop! Poit!

Bowyer: NYAAAA! Hurts, it does!

Waluigi: Star guy used a rainbow block to switch places, and Bowyer got hit with his own arrows. Too bad he wasn't frozen, Waluigi could have used the day off.

Millennium Star: Ho ho ho! Not bad, but you’ll need to do far more than that to defeat me. Fire!

Foom! Foom! Foom!

Waluigi: Waluigi hears a cannon firing, but where–


Bowyer: Nya!

Twang! Twang! Twang! KABOOM!

Waluigi: Bow guy shot arrows into the Bob-ombs, blowing them up in midair! Waluigi is slightly impressed.

Bowyer: Nya, too strong! I will fix this!


Waluigi: Three buttons have appeared on the ground! Waluigi can barely read their complex words, but I think they say “Board”, “Item”, and “Mini-Game”!

Bowyer: When Bowyer shoots an arrow… that power, OFF!

TWANG! Thunk!

Millennium Star: How foolish. Nothing can stop my Bob-omb barrage!

Millennium Star: What?

TWANG! Thock!

Waluigi: Ooh, an arrow right in Star Guy’s forehead!

Millennium Star: Hmph. Sealing all of my board powers, are you?

Bowyer: Nya, frozen you shall be! Nya!


Millennium Star: Such obvious volleys are nothing against my mustached magnificence. Let’s see how you do without those arrows!

Bowyer: What?

Millennium Star: Ho ho ho! Time to use this Barter Box!

Waluigi: Barter Box? Nerd! Explain it to me!

Larry: …

Waluigi: Nerd?

Pokey: Switches items.

Roy: Pokey! You’re back!

Pokey: Arrows were weak.

Waluigi: So the box switches items, huh? Waluigi fails to see how–


TWANG! Thock! Poof!

Millennium Star: An excellent decision.

Waluigi: Waluigi understands now! Bowyer can’t seal anything else or he won’t be able to attack!

Roy: You understood that?

Waluigi: Waluigi was handed a cue card.

Millennium Star: Unfortunately, nothing can protect you from me now! Let the star storm begin!

Shoom! Shoom! Shoom!


Millennium Star: Those babbling aliens from the last match were more of a match than you! Enjoy your outdated system of fighting!

Bowyer: Outdated system?! All you do is party all the time, nya!


Millennium Star: Nice shot! I commend you!

Waluigi: Bow guy shot an arrow through one of the stars, blowing up Millennium Star!

Millennium Star: Perhaps this shall be interesting after all.

Bowyer: NYA!


Millennium Star: And you are boring me once more. What say we settle this on even terms?

Bowyer: Winning shall be Bowyer, nya!

Millennium Star: We’ll see how confident you are very, very soon.


Waluigi: Where did they go?!

Tumble: HI!

Waluigi: GAH! Waluigi’s gambling debt has come back to haunt him!

Tumble: Don’t be silly. The Millennium Star transported himself and Bowyer into a mini-game! You can watch the goings-on inside my head!

Roy: Okay, this is one of the more morbid cameras we’ve ever used.

Millennium Star: The game is Archer-ival! Naturally, you will be the archer.

Bowyer: Nya!

Millennium Star: Simply hit the three targets shaped like Mario, Geno, and Mallow before time runs out. Go!


Bowyer: Nya, nya!


Mallow Target: Oh my!

Mario Target: Mamamia!

Waluigi: Bowyer is quickly winning the mini-game! Was this a mistake by Millennium Star?!

Bowyer: Coins I shall be given, nya! Just one more, nya!

TWANG! Whoosh!

Waluigi: A twist!

Bowyer: Only one miss. Not bad, nya!


Bowyer: NYA?!

Millennium Star: Ho ho ho! Looks like your archery skills aren’t as good as you think!

Bowyer: The best is Bowyer, nya!


Bowyer: NYAAA!



Bowyer: Nya!

Millennium Star: And with that, let us be finished.


Bowyer: NYAAAA!

Pokey: Winner, Millennium Star.

Waluigi: That was not even a close match! Star guy headbutted bow guy after he lost his stupid little game.

Millennium Star: What part of my mini-games are “stupid”?

Waluigi: Waluigi burned a hole clean through his hand playing your dumb tug of war! Why do you think Waluigi always wears gloves?!

Roy: That’s not his fault. You have the durability of wet paper.

Waluigi: Waluigi likes to describe himself as lithe.

Roy: Anyways, what am I going to do with Larry now that he’s frozen? Hmm…

Waluigi: We could rob him.

Roy: Nah, I did that as he came in. I know! I’ll stick him out front with a sign for the next match.

Waluigi: Waluigi likes the way you think. But now it is time to go!

Roy: End transmission.

The Winner

The Loser

Voting Results (highlight to see):
1. Millenium Star: 60%
2. Bowyer: 40%
Nominee Results (highlight to see):
1. Morton: 68%
2. Yaridovich: 32%
Failed Nominations: These eligible fighters were nominated, but not often enough to make the ballot.
- Bogmire, Bowser Jr, Chained Kong, Chainless Chomp, Cloud 'N Candy, Count Down, Culex, DK, Domino, Exor, Fishin' Boo, Fuzzy, Grodus, Junker, King K, Magikoopa, Midbus, Mimi, Muddy Buddy, Rawk Hawk, Rex, Rip Cheato, Wart
Disallowed Nominations: You're not allowed to nominate these now - so don't waste your vote!
- Spy Guy (tourist didn't cast a vote with this nomination)
- Pokey, Fawful, Petey Piranha (already fought this season)
- Machine Made Bowyer (Machine Mades are, for all intents and purposes, the same characters)


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